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The one eyed monster 

I gotta go take the one eyed monster to the optometrist.
Words you can keep

wrestling the one eyed monster

To jerk off, masterbate, relieve yourself sexually, jerk it till you cant work it, putting on some vaseline and greko-roman wrestling your penis
wrestling the one eyed monster by A2K February 18, 2003

feeding the one eyed monster 

when a person of the male caliber rubs his dong until love juices squit
"oh man, i feed the one eyed monster yestorday and some love juices suirted in my face

The Raging One-eyed Chicken Monster 

When a man ejaculates into his partner's right nostrill at a 45 degree angle and then proceeds to punch them in the rib 4 and 1/2 times causing their partner to scream, In which the man seizes the oppurtunity to shove his one eyed chicken monster (a.k.a. his penis) down their throat, therefore blocking their air passage causing the exixting semen in the nostril to travel up and spew out of the person's eye.
Johnny Applebee wants to spice up his sex life with his girlfriend Sally-Mae Dinkerdoodle by performing The Raging One-eyed Chicken Monster to which she responds "Golly gee Johnny do you think my nostrils can hold your massive load?"
More from Urban Dictionary

Satellite baddies

Attractive women who are far from your location.
There are no hot girls in the area, theres only satellite baddies.
Satellite baddies by Banksy123 September 5, 2026
Word of the Day on September 10, 2026
Omg, the ramifications!”
-“You forgot about the rammys, bro.”
Rammys by Brandonmical August 4, 2023
Word of the Day on September 9, 2026

Failure Shower 

When you fail at something in life (eg. failing an exam or not getting a job), go home and spend an hour just standing in the shower, propping yourself up against the wall with your eyes on your feet.
Caleb knew the only thing to do after he didnt get prefect was take a failure shower.
Failure Shower by Vikingnz October 27, 2009
Word of the Day on September 8, 2026
Acronym for Non-Athletic Regular Person. Your schools lacrosse team probably shouts it at you while you walk by.
Lookie at these bunch of narps, NARP NARP NARP
NARP by Douchebag McKenzy March 31, 2010
Word of the Day on September 7, 2026

High School Liquid 

A person who can freely travel between and fit in with all high school social groups and classes.
He is high school liquid, he ate lunch with the nerds and hung out with the jocks after school.
High School Liquid by Thaedris July 30, 2008
Word of the Day on September 6, 2026

Purple Patch 

To describe coming into something good, coming into good luck and or good times.

Like walking over small green hills in the countryside then coming across a purple patch of flowers, thus it being unique and out of the ordinary.
I hit a real purple patch.

The other day this good thing happened unexpectedly then I was lucky with this, it was unique, I hit a real purple patch.
Purple Patch by Ralph Shitstorm October 27, 2020
Word of the Day on September 5, 2026
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