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Technologically illiterate

Someone who doesn't know and will probably never learn how to work a computer or any form of technology, i.e video games, cell phones, microwaves, etc.
Mother: Honey, where's the space bar?
Teen: Mom, its the biggest key on the keyboard.
Mother: Oh thank you, that really helps a lot.
Teen: *Sighs* Mom, you are so technologically illiterate.

Technologically Challenged 

The sort of people that find the simplest of everyday technological feats and gadgets to be a challenge in making sense and use of. Much unlike the technologically impaired duck meme and the first day on the internet grandma meme, these are all very real persons and there is a very real blog being written with them in mind (The Low Tech-IQ Blog)
Woah dude, this smartphone has gotten the best of me. Feels i'm a bit technologically challenged.

Technologically impaired 

someone that has NO CLUE on how to use technology, such as computers, cell phones, ipods, mp3s.
Meh: Did you see her in the computer lab today?
You: Yeah! She was totally technologically impaired!

Technologically neutered 

To strip technology of all meaningful features, thereby violating its original intent to solve problems in an automated way. This is typically done by an enterprise through a series of decisions made by folks with no understanding of technology, e.g. legal or risk. Fears that drive to these decisions are typically focused on trying to prevent behaviors through technology limitations, without isolating that the issue is the behavior. The end result will likely be a set of technology that looks similar to the current technology set, just with a different look and feel on top of a fundamentally rearchitected platform typically costing millions of dollars.

The approach would be equivalent to not allowing knives in the cafeteria for fear of stabbings vs not hiring people who won't stab each other. Only technologically neutering costs much more.
They technologically neutered the SharePoint environment by removing everything but the list and document library. It is no longer usable for its core collaboration functions.

We have technologically neutered our mobile email by not allowing attachments.

They technologically neutered their CRM by turning off the workflow features.

Technologically Retarded 

One who has no grasp of technology, no matter how times one has to explain how to use something electronic
Wife: Honey what button do I push to turn on the stereo
husband: You are so Technologically Retarded, press the Audio button

Technologically disabled 

The politically correct way to say someone is technologically retarded or ileterate. Someone who cannot understand how technology works or how to use it. Can be shortened to T.D.
Melissa: my dad just called me to ask me how to turn his laptop again.
Mike: your dad is technologically disabled !
Melissa: yea, he's so TD!
More from Urban Dictionary
A US deep south term for an alligator. Usually used in the Cajun dialect.
Take the big pirogue, I saw a huge swamp dog out there earlier.
swamp dog by Crystal Ambrose May 22, 2006
Word of the Day on October 12, 2026

Throat Sweats 

The feeling and build up in your mouth/throat of saliva that sometimes accompanies nausea.
Oh man those burritos gave me the throat sweats, I hope I don’t have food poisoning.
Throat Sweats by TacoFings420 April 23, 2024
Word of the Day on October 11, 2026
Being ignored by someone when making a statement or asking a question. Also known as blanked and turfed.
Person 1: Did u watch ** last nite?
Person 2:......
Person 3: O no u got aired!
aired by Pietro February 9, 2005
Word of the Day on October 10, 2026

piddlefart

Instead of doing my homework, I decided to piddlefart around for two hours.
piddlefart by Rene April 25, 2005
Word of the Day on October 9, 2026
anyone who succeeds in disgracing/over indulging themselves in the throws of clubland
28 hours and 4 clubs later, gurning for england but still refusing to go home - a total wrongun!!
wrongun by bevvers March 21, 2007
Word of the Day on October 8, 2026

square grouper

Nickname given to bales of marijuana thrown overboard or out of airplanes. Origin is reportedly from members of the US Coast Guard in the area of Southern Florida.
"Base we've got some square groupers floating outside of Miami harbor."
square grouper by slipsheet November 6, 2004
Word of the Day on October 7, 2026
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