Tabledance 

A striptease. Can be received in just about ANY strip club you can go to. Despite what some people think people DO still call them table-dances!

All I want for Christmas is a good table-dance from Candy...

Tabledance by Anonymous December 1, 2004

table dance 

In sex work, a table dance is a form of striptease in which a stripper focuses their attention on one client or john. Unlike a lap dance (or, euphemistically, a "VIP dance") there is no physical contact between the sex worker and the client.

My buddies got drunk at the strip joint and started dancing on tables. The hired-thug bouncers explained very rudely to them that is is not what they meant by advertising a "table dance" on offer for an exorbitant fee.

table dance by bitchuck September 23, 2023

Tableface

A particular form of deepface using a solid surface to prevent too much wriggling and/or enjoyment on her part

"I reckon we should get the shorter tables baby - more accesible for the ol' tableface"

Tableface by theashtonstrangler January 11, 2009

tablesauce 

Otherwise known as "salt tablets," commonly used by athletes for rehydration. Highly discouraged by health fitness professionals.

"Mane, pass me the tablesauce! I'm feelin' a little dry, shorty!"

tablesauce by Anonymous 17 February 9, 2006

tablevangelized 

When a Christian or other religious person tries to use their tips as a way to proselytize their server/ waiter to their religion.

Usually takes up time talking unnecessarily about their religion, delaying their own order and gives a low tip in the name of GOD.

Can also use tracts disguised as dollar bills to trick wait staff into reading more thinking it’s actually cash.

“Hey did table 2 leave a good tip? Thought I saw a $20.

Naw man, just some religious person tablevangelizing me.”

“Why were you at that table so long? Is something wrong?

Nah I just got tablevangelized.”

tablevangelized by K-Fed42 July 18, 2021