Stumpy lumber jack 

To wake up with morning wood late for work show up and your dick gets caught in a wood chipper.

Mike woke up with morning wood tripped and fell in a wood chipper,oh I guess you can say he called now a stumpy lumber jack. Careful working around the equipment boys don't want to stumpy lumber jack yourself.

Stumpy lumber jack by Pours when it rains December 12, 2023

tree stump lumberjack 

Somebody who goes around trying to cut down to size people who are already as low as they can get

Did you hear Rick today? He was telling that homeless dude that his pants went out of style 10 years ago.

Yeah, he's a real tree stump lumberjack

tree stump lumberjack by Ed Gein Number Nine December 24, 2010