Skip to main content

Soft Office 

Evolution of working from home - working from bed.

After several staggered alarm snoozes, waking 5 minutes before your shift starts, you drag the laptop into the warm sanctuary of cosy goodness for a your wretched day of work.

You'll likely only get up for coffee and comfort breaks and you may well don a shirt over your pjs in case you get a video call from your boss.

The unlucky may fall foul of napping through an entire morning to wake up drenched in sweat, having missed 7 Skype calls from an angry Manager.
Cor blimey, I went one too many on the Sunday wines last night. How fortunate I’m in the soft office tomorrow.
Soft Office mug front
Get the Soft Office mug.
See more merch

Soft Office Bod

Soft Office Bod is ultimately the body you get from working in an office all day: 8 hrs, florescent lights and a chair for your fat ass. Soft, lumpy and pale. Soft Office Bod is a noun, not a verb, and never used with the word, "a" in front of it.
Dang, now that I have this full-time job I sure have soft office bod. Where did my beach body go?

or

Charlie: "Whoa, what's that frightening white thing over there?"

Joe: "Oh that's Allison. She got a job as an accountant, and now she's got full-on soft office bod."

Office Soft 

Being too used to a cosy office environment and unable to perform physical labour.
Or unable to perform in non-air-conditioned environments.
1, "Call Dave to help us shift this timber"

"Not Dave he's office soft"

2, It's freezing in the warehouse. I must be getting office soft.
Office Soft by The Saint 7 November 29, 2016
A toe rag was originally a foot wrapping used, since mediaeval times up until the mid-nineteenth century, to protect the foot from chafing by boots or shoes. As these were, quite literally, rags they weren’t usually washed, and so with use they became very smelly until they were thrown away. Because of the similarity in smell, toe rag also became the name applied to dried, salted cod or other things with a strong, unpleasant, fishy smell. It didn’t take that long before the name was applied to someone who was an obnoxious, unpleasant OIC.
1 “Socks! Those aren’t socks you smelly git, they’re toe rags!”
2 “What have you been cooking? Smells like toe rag!”
3 “I can smell ‘er fanny from ‘ere, proper toe rag.”
4 That Heale Malcolm is a right toe rag.
Toe Rag by AKACroatalin November 29, 2016
Word of the Day on July 24, 2026

Eternity leave 

When some resigns or retires from a job, they are on "eternity leave". This can also refer to someone who has passed away, especially someone who worked somewhere for a long time, retired/resigned, then passed away later.
Oh I'm sorry, you didn't know that Kelly is on eternity leave? She resigned and moved to Hawaii!

With regrets I would like to inform you that my boss is officially on eternity leave. I will never see or hear them again. Ever.
Eternity leave by LingDanc803 February 7, 2023
Word of the Day on July 23, 2026
The hypothetical man (often a sinister character who decided not to go to boot camp) that is doing your girlfriend/wife while you are on deployment overseas.
Ain't no use in goin home,
Jody's got your girl and gone.
Ain't no use in goin back,
Jody's got your Cadillac,
Ain't no use in feeling blue,
Jody's took your checkbook too.
jody by Sgt Apan March 31, 2006
Word of the Day on July 22, 2026

girl grip 

The ability girls and women have developed to hold several items at once in one hand. The skill has been developed due to the lack of pockets in women's clothing.
I thought she'd need multiple trips to carry her phone, keys, wallet, and Starbucks to her car since she needed the other hand to open the door, but she used her impressive girl grip to carry everything in one hand.
girl grip by SillyMilly33 July 31, 2023
Word of the Day on July 21, 2026