scissor me timber

The act of two females scissoring while a male is underneath with his penis up between their vagina's.

I caught an early flight home and walked in on my wife scissoring some chick, to which I replied "Hmmmm... Perhaps this would be a good time to scissor me timber!"

scissor me timber by Ssylar October 27, 2008

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Scissor Me Timber

1. A phrase known as an activity of sexual satisfaction amongst an assemblage of lady pirates.

2. The female attempt to dismember a man's penis from his body by utilizing the unyielding strength of her labial lips.

i.e. Sever Me Timbers

Lady Pirates? Scissor me timbers? Get it?

ARRRGH! As she wrapped her legs about his torso with the force of one-thousand seahorse, her lips opened like the fearsome kraken to disarm the man of his weary vessel. "Scissor me timber," he shouted in vain, "if I weren't still coming I would feel wretched pain!"

Scissor Me Timber by Long Jane Silver March 12, 2010

scissor me timbers

A phrase used in a south park episode where Mr. or Ms. Garrison explored being a lesbian. Garrison was in bed with another woman "scissoring" (in which two women inter-lock each others legs for sexual arrousal). it is at this time that Garrison becomes excited and says "Oh yeah scissor me timbers!!!".

Lesbian: "I haven't gotten a piece of ass in a while I really wish somebody would scissor me timbers."

scissor me timbers by Steven Siravo April 21, 2007

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Scissor me timbers

A variation of "shiver me timbers," a common pirating term, screamed by women during lesbian lovemaking. The term refers to their interlocking legs, which are often spread at an angle similar to open scissors.

"How does this double headed dildo feel, lesbian lover?"

"Scissor me timbers!"

Scissor me timbers by Motorboating SOB April 13, 2009