Intentionally offbeat,
blunt, and
sarcastic Australian humor to exclaim that you mean
business and you're not here to waste time.
It's also rhyming slang with "not here to kick the tires" of a car for sale, which has a similar meaning.
1. "So, are we going to the pub or what?"...Jono
"We're not here to fuck spiders mate, let's fuck this puppy."...Sambo
2. "Your first month on the job has been fantastic. Sales have
gone through the roof"...Manager
"Well, I'm not here to fuck spiders. When I'm I going to
get my commission
check?...Sales rep