A high
school located in West St. Louis County’s white,
SUV-ridden suburbs where the diversity is bused in and the futility of the No Child Left Behind Act is demonstrated daily. The science department generally suffers from a lack of
hair and an overabundance of anecdotes and fishing stories, while the top-notch English department continues to produce an abundance of teen angst poets and self-centered essayists. The
school’s motto “Head North for Excellence” is not a joke: head two counties north to Pattonville and you will get an excellent education.
Freshie: They give us free
t-shirts with motivational messages at Parkway North?
Cool!
Senior: Not so fast—you have to have a 3.5 GPA to get that…
Freshie: A 3.5? But the only way I couldn’t get that here is if I skipped class daily, smoked
pot in the parking lot, stuffed a dead
fish into the air vent in the library, and tried to cheat using the wrong answer key on a test…
Senior: You’ll get there…