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no johns 

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"No johns" means that you can't make excuses. It is the perfect counter argument to anyone who is making any type of excuse whatever. When someone makes excuses or tries to make excuses, they are "johning". If this occurs, tell them "NO JOHHNZZ".
Me: "Dude, I just 4 stocked your Marth with my Pikachu.

n00b: "Yeah, but Marth isn't my main character."

Me (as well as crowd): "NO JOHHNZZ SON"
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No Johns 

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No Excuses
"That was definitely East Coast DI."
~ Commentator (East Coast)

"What's wrong with our DI?"
~ Mango (West Coast)

"Your DI is horrible. Trust me. Your DI causes you to die."

"Our DI rapes. We like to have fun, so we let let each other combo each other. That's how it works. We're not super-serious like you guys."

"Alright. In the East Coast, we got this saying called 'No Johns'."

Revival of Melee 1 Crew Battle Commentary
No Johns by OnionChild December 26, 2012
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Related Words
no johns • Please no johns • Kiarra no middle name Johnson • No Jhons • No Condom John • john no fun • John no way home • no • No u • no homo

Please no johns 

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When someone was making excuses to win an argument or an excuse to win an argument, say please no johns.
Person one: If my neutral air actually connected I would've wo-

Reggie: please no johns.
Please no johns by 9dohead October 7, 2020
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Please no johns 

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It is something to say if someone is making excuses to win an argument or the reason they lost a game.
Person one: Zero suit up b kill's bowser at 70?!!

Reggie: Please no johns.
Please no johns by 9dohead October 7, 2020
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No Jhons 

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No excuses for a loss in Super Smash Bros.
"Dude you only won because you used Cloud"

"No jhons cuck"
No Jhons by Rootnewah January 30, 2017
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No John's

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A term used by pussies who deny humility or loss with sad and pathetic excuses. Typically associated with the smash bros melee community.
Before we started the match I told my opponent no john's. So that when I win he won't deny defeat.
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No Condom John

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A man who has multiple baby mommas from sleeping around, has 6 kids, early 30s Male.
" There goes no condom John and his basketball team."
No Condom John by John Micsott March 25, 2019
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More from Urban Dictionary

sexspan 

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The number of years you are still sexually active
While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.
sexspan by Dr Kat April 21, 2022
Word of the Day on October 28, 2026
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womp 

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A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.
You didn't get any napkins with your takeout pork fried rice? Womp womp.
womp by 175623226 November 3, 2011
Word of the Day on October 27, 2026
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Poggers 

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When your wife’s boyfriend let you sleep past 8pm 😎😎
Wife’s boyfriend: You have 5 more minutes
Me: Poggers!
Poggers by Just_Charles April 14, 2020
Word of the Day on October 26, 2026
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Oblication 

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A vacation, feeling more like an obligation, that involves visiting or staying with family.
So Joe where are you taking the kids for spring break vacation? We are going on an oblication to Boca to visit my mother-in-law.
Oblication by kimmerr May 5, 2011
Word of the Day on October 25, 2026
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Surf Dracula Syndrome 

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A phenomenon in film/television series, most notably streaming series, where the main premise is drawn out to such a point that it takes an entire season or more to get the parts of the series the audience is actually interested in seeing.

For example, if a series is titled "Surf Dracula," a majority of viewers would tune in expecting to see Dracula surfing by the first or second episode. However, the entire first season would instead be tedious padding and backstory before finally ending with Dracula surfing in the last five minutes of the season finale.
I watched "Smallville" on Netflix the other day. Dude, it was ten seasons of filler before he finally flew! Major Surf Dracula Syndrome!
Surf Dracula Syndrome by AOmundson June 18, 2023
Word of the Day on October 24, 2026
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