A chronic, autoimmune-like condition characterised primarily by frizzy hair. The disorder is purported to arise from reduced scalp blood flow attributed to the interaction with a male Homo sapiens. This absence is hypothesised to trigger the release of a fictitious mediator, menamine, which diffuses to the hypothalamus and scalp, resulting in hair frizzing. In
exaggerated accounts, severe cases are associated with involuntary contraction of the biceps and triceps and significant
psychological distress, whereas mild presentations are limited to frizzy hair alone.
Due to high circulating concentrations of menamine, the body is said to enter a whole-body apoptotic response, producing a transient “bolo” appearance. This presentation should not be mistaken for gym-induced hypertrophy but is described as a terminal sign preceding
catastrophic systemic failure, purportedly resulting from male exposure in a non-platonic context.
