Dude, when I got to my house, I was laying ass like a mother fucker. It was magnificent, I had to quarantine my bathroom.
by Cpt. Thickens December 2, 2010
Get the Laying Ass mug.When ur not faithful or can't be trusted
by Zaza;( March 8, 2017
Get the lying ass nigga mug.When dealing with a lying-ass motherfucker, the Lying-ass Motherfucker Coefficient (LAMC)is the multiplier (generally around .39) added to any numbers (such as income, number of recent sexual relations, cost of automobile, amount of alcohol consumed, length of prison sentence, etc) quoted by said lying-ass motherfucker, with the intent of approximating a truer estimate of the referenced events.
The actual value of the LAMC fluctuates depending on the relative purity of the lying-ass motherfucker in question and must be adjusted accordingly. A LAMC of .8 or .9 is only appropriate for a "part-time" or a "fly-by-night" lying-ass motherfucker, while a true, pathological lying-ass motherfucker often necessitates a .1 or even a .05!
Use a known quantity to assign a LAMC value to the lying-ass motherfuckers in your life. If, for instance, a lying ass motherfucker at your work claims he made a cool $120 in tips over the course of his shift when you spotted him pocketing a paltry $45, you can safely place his LAMC at .375, give or take a few hundredths.
Once a LAMC is established, it tends to remain fairly constant, varying only in cases of extreme mental excitement, anguish, or upheaval. Lying-ass motherfuckers who are manic drunks, for example, often require a lower LAMC value when they are on the sauce. Tears in the beer, however, can indicate that a higher value should be used ("in vino veritas" rings true, for depressive drunk lying-ass motherfuckers at least).
A final note: the LAMC only applies to numbers which the lying-ass motherfucker has motive to inflate (like the number of people it took to beat the shit out of him last night downtown). For instances where a lower number would seem "cooler" (such as the number of statuatory rape charges on his permanent record) a Reverse Lying-ass Motherfucker Coefficient (RLAMC) must be employed. The RLAMC will be covered in a later article.
The actual value of the LAMC fluctuates depending on the relative purity of the lying-ass motherfucker in question and must be adjusted accordingly. A LAMC of .8 or .9 is only appropriate for a "part-time" or a "fly-by-night" lying-ass motherfucker, while a true, pathological lying-ass motherfucker often necessitates a .1 or even a .05!
Use a known quantity to assign a LAMC value to the lying-ass motherfuckers in your life. If, for instance, a lying ass motherfucker at your work claims he made a cool $120 in tips over the course of his shift when you spotted him pocketing a paltry $45, you can safely place his LAMC at .375, give or take a few hundredths.
Once a LAMC is established, it tends to remain fairly constant, varying only in cases of extreme mental excitement, anguish, or upheaval. Lying-ass motherfuckers who are manic drunks, for example, often require a lower LAMC value when they are on the sauce. Tears in the beer, however, can indicate that a higher value should be used ("in vino veritas" rings true, for depressive drunk lying-ass motherfuckers at least).
A final note: the LAMC only applies to numbers which the lying-ass motherfucker has motive to inflate (like the number of people it took to beat the shit out of him last night downtown). For instances where a lower number would seem "cooler" (such as the number of statuatory rape charges on his permanent record) a Reverse Lying-ass Motherfucker Coefficient (RLAMC) must be employed. The RLAMC will be covered in a later article.
Andrew: Man, Jacob was wasted when I came in last night! He said he drank a whole twelve pack when he was out with Tina!
Joe: Man, fuck that noise. You know that Jacob's Lying-ass Motherfucker Coefficient is a good .25 easy. He drank three beers, cried for a while, got Tina's voicemail, got ten other girls' voicemails, watched TV, and then passed out on the couch, which is where you found him when you came in.
Andrew: You're right, man. Dude's a lying-ass motherfucker. I don't know what I was thinking.
Joe: Man, fuck that noise. You know that Jacob's Lying-ass Motherfucker Coefficient is a good .25 easy. He drank three beers, cried for a while, got Tina's voicemail, got ten other girls' voicemails, watched TV, and then passed out on the couch, which is where you found him when you came in.
Andrew: You're right, man. Dude's a lying-ass motherfucker. I don't know what I was thinking.
by squizzot May 1, 2009
Get the Lying-ass Motherfucker Coefficient mug.A lying ass bitch is a woman who melifacently twist the situation in front of her by stating irrelevant and hypocritical allegations from events prior or assumed to bend the rules of engagement back into her favor. Example: Marie I can't sopport you anymore, I gave you a place to live when you lost your house and you have told me for six months that you will get a job to pay me back. But all you do is nothing , now I have to move because of the extra strain of taking care of you . Marie's response: I'm so depressed that I can't even get dressed most days because you treat me like I'm a peice of shit! Me speaking:? Um this problem is six months old now.!. How can you just assume that I would strain my financial situation to the state of bankruptcy and homelessness for you to chill ..Marie speaking: You don't have to start calling me names ok, I don't deserve this ! I fucking hate you mother fucker!Response: .... you get what's going down next... Who the fuck?! What ?! You just what?! Oh hell no bitch! (Actually treat her like she says you have been) outcome : Bitch start fucking your neighbor two doors down and takes sweet ass time getting her shit out your house. Then when you move she already did the same shit to neighbor and is squatting back at the house you lost and talking mad shit like she made you leave because you didn't do shit! Lmfao ,loose lips sink ships bitches.
by Haskin79 April 5, 2016
Get the lying ass bitch mug.A layin ass nigga is a person who lies, cheats and steals their way through life. A LAN will smoke a pipe of crystal meth in front of anyone and eagerly try to convince them they are “real” and telling the truth. A LAN will also shuffle for weed if they have to. A LAN can be male or female and any ethnicity or race. A LAN might have a job, or they might not, but nobody will ever know because 99% of the time LAN’s are liars.
“What up wit ‘B?’” “Oh, he’s living with his old lady again.” “Damn…. He lost his job, lost his ride, lost his girlfriend… he a Layin Ass Nigga makin’ her pay for his shit.” “She’s a Layin Ass Nigga cuz she pays for his layin' ass.
by FabulousDarkness August 10, 2016
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by WEsPiLlThEtEa July 18, 2019
Get the Lying Ass Hoe mug.by Magiranger November 24, 2022
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