Felt-tip 

A condition caused by errant pubic hairs, caught in a mans underpants, becoming stuck to the tip of his penis.

Bee: "So, did you go down on him?"

Charl: "Well, almost. But when he dropped his draws, I noticed he had major felt-tip. I was out of there in seconds!"

Felt-tip by Paul William Kemp September 7, 2009

Felt-tip poo 

A turd that takes a lot of toilet paper to wipe away. The name derives from a felt-tip pen that always seems to have a little bit of ink left in it.

Man 1: Blimey, you took a long time in the toilet there, mate.

Man 2: Yes. It was a felt-tip poo and took half a bog-roll to wipe away.

Felt-tip poo by john1million March 1, 2014

Felt Tip Fairy 

An artist who is homosexual.

Take this to the felt tip fairy.
He is a felt tip fairy.

Felt Tip Fairy by Dr Smith, Dbn April 13, 2011

hitting the bottle with a brown felt tip 

To hit the bottle with a brown felt tip or hitting the bottle with a brown felt tip is a form of traditional glass beer bottle tapping common in the Seaside Town of Bridlington, East Yorkshire in England UK.
Amber or brown glass beer bottle tapping is locally known as tapping the glass or hitting the bottle with a brown felt tip and implies quite simply that one, when ones' glass (or bottle) is empty quickly taps the side of the glass or bottle (with a brown felt tip pen) to give notice audibly to anyone in range that another beverage is required by the tapper.
Landlords in Public Houses in Bridlington now insist that only brown felt tip pens are used for bottle hitting. The reason for this is that if the ink end of the felt tip were to touch the label (or glass) then only a brown mark would be left which may (or may not) blend in with the brown glass or commonly used cream/brown labels.
Vulgar colours such as Purple, Pink and Yellow are frowned upon and usually a tappee (one who taps) would either be ignored or escorted from the premises for failing to adhere to the appropriate colour code.
Quite often one may see the sign "Tap Room" as one enters (or leaves) a Public House in Bridlington. Tap Room is (of course) a simplified version of "Tapping Room", easier to read when driving by in a hurry or when not quite sober and visually wonky.

Charlie finished his Ale and reached into his jacket for his brown felt tip.
He deftly tapped the side of his bottle and was quickly served (with a smile) by the beautiful Brenda behind the Bar.
Alfred (the Landlord) took Brenda to one side and whispered in her ear "Charlie has been hitting the bottle with a brown felt tip since 11.30 this morning and he's still upright, sober and tapping like's there's no tomorrow!"

hitting the bottle with a brown felt tip by Barry Davies February 28, 2007

wiping a felt-tip 

when you take a dump, and it takes rolls of toilet paper to attempt to get clean. Everytime you wipe you get a mark on the paper.

Everytime you wipe it's like wiping a felt-tip marker. Keeps making a mark on the toilet paper.

wiping a felt-tip by zse June 2, 2010

felt tipped

Its when one, by unfortunate circumstances, either pierces the tissue paper or holds the tissue to far forward whilst wiping ones anus resulting in one having brown coloured fingers with brown tissuey felt stuck to the end.

John: Ah, for fuck sake Dave, I felt tipped my fingers again!

Dave: Yeah alright mate! Wash your nails before you finger jenny.

felt tipped by JJPno.1 October 3, 2013

felttipthieves 

name for a realllly good band

oh my god they are such a felttipthieves!

felttipthieves by ynoyrb October 29, 2008