A
new economic policy proposed by the presidential hopeful M. Rommey. The presidential candidate and other proponents of this program argue that it will stimulate the economy
via a “
flush-down” effect, similar to the “trickle-down” effect that revolutionized the economic thinking during the Reagan administration.
The "A golden yacht for every billionaire" program is backed by economic research. A recent, double-blind
study has revealed that billionaires are at least
15% more likely to spend time in their yachts if they are given additional yachts made out of solid
gold. Because the plumbing of yachts is such that fecal waste is discharged directly into the
water, providing golden yachts to billionaires will thuswise result in 15% more fecal waste from billionaires being available in the aquatic ecosystem. In this way, poor people may supplement their diets with partially digested corn kernels and discarded
shrimp nubs that they may find at the
water’s edge. The additional nutrients in the aquatic ecosystem are also expected to positively impact the
fishing industry as billionaire feces is known to attract certain species of fish. As a result of the increased nutritive resources available, the average lower and middle class worker will have the energy to
work three jobs instead of just two, resulting in additional tax revenue to fund the program and generally stimulating the economy.
