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Bedtime Story 

The act of pulling out the porn just before sleeping and having a wank before passing out asleep. A common practice amongst teenage boys, as well as self-proclaimed celibates.
Man - "So what did you get up to last night ?"

Colleague - "Not much, just watched tv and read myself a bedtime story"
Bedtime Story by Ngoc8r February 12, 2007

Bedtime story 

When you cover your dick with peanut better and jelly mixed together and let your dog lick it off.
When you break out the jar of peanut butter mixed with jelly and get a bedtime story and let your dog lick it off.
Bedtime story by Lotsolols June 7, 2018

Bedtime Story 

An unexpected reception of a sexual act from another person at night, in one's bed.
Shawn thought Sara had gone home, but she returned to give him a bedtime story
Bedtime Story by Vpdotcom March 28, 2009

Reading Grandma A Bedtime Story 

Well I gotta go read grandma a bedtime story.

Reading Grandma A Bedtime Story 

To masturbate while eating out old women-also known as playing Counter Strike.
Man, go read grandma a bed time story.

adult bedtime story

Adult version of a bedtime story, meant to help get a good night sleep.
A: Let's read an adult bedtime story tonight shall we?

B: Sure.

A: A long time ago, in a swamp far far away, there lived a lonely ogre. Then one day... Zzz...zzz...
More from Urban Dictionary

Plate of Brown 

A plate of brown consists of foods that have little to no nutritional value, and are typically deep fried. A true plate of brown will also be accompanied by a dark soda.
Wanna go to meal hall & grab a plate of brown?
Plate of Brown by Cheddar Craigson September 18, 2020
Word of the Day on October 22, 2026

Larpenomics

When finance content creators rent out fancy cars and flex cash to seem richer than they really are in order to promote and sell their “get rich quick” courses.
Andrew Tate has mastered the field of larpenomics
Larpenomics by Rbois09 October 21, 2026
Word of the Day on October 21, 2026

Palmela Handerson 

Your hand that you masturbate with.
Girlfriend: What are you going to do for the next week while I'm on holiday?

Boyfriend: Have a visit from Palmela Handerson of course!
Word of the Day on October 20, 2026
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