Amazheimer's

Condition which causes you to place an Amazon order, then shortly after remember something else you needed and place another order.

Wow, 10 Amazon boxes showed up on my door today. My Amazheimer's must be acting up again.

Person 1: Bro, your Amazheimer's is getting out of control.
Person 2: It's OK, I have Prime.

Amazheimer's by SamboMayhem August 1, 2020

Amazheimer's

Completely forget that you ordered anything and are surprised when the delivery arrives.

Husband 'what have you ordered now?'
Me 'i don't know, I have Amazheimer's' 🤷

Amazheimer's by JaMaCo2013 August 3, 2020

Alzheimer's

A disease most commonly found in the older generation of people causing them to lose pre-existing memories and have trouble making new ones. More serious cases can lead to difficulty with language, disorientation, mood swings, etc.

Lil' Jimmy: "Mama, why doesn't Grandpa remember me?"
Mama: "He's got Alzheimer's, Honey, he won't remember you."
Lil' Jimmy: "Oh... Will Grandma get Old-Timer's too then?"

Alzheimer's by CharlesJJJ November 3, 2016

Alzheimer's

Another nasty dementia that robs your loved ones of their own mind and makes you grieve them while they are still physically alive. There's much medical work being done to find a cure because it is going to hit alot of boomers hard in the next few years the same way it hit their parents hard.

Doctor: Your Mom's in the early stages of Alzheimer'.

Me: What is Alzheimer's?
Doctor: Alzheimer's is a form of dementia that destroys memories

Alzheimer's by Five year old drinking coffee June 12, 2020

Chess Alzheimer's 

When you're playing chess and you take so long thinking about what move you're going to make that you end up making an idiotic move you spotted in the first 5 seconds but forgot about later on.

During a game of chess, after thinking about his move for 20 minutes ...

Ryan: Ah ha! Eat that! You have been had my friend.
(Jon swoops in and takes Ryan's queen)
Ryan: (Gasp)
Jon: Looks like the ol' Chess Alzheimer's got you again. Checkmate, fool.
Ryan: (Tears up)
Jon: It's okay man. Let's go watch Upstream Color. It'll cheer you up.
Ryan: No thanks, I like stories that are actually good. You know, with a beginning, middle, and end. Fuck that $hit. I'm going to play Halo. (flips chess board and leaves with dignity)

Chess Alzheimer's by RhInO May 18, 2013

herbal Alzheimer's

The effects of marijuana usage that remain for a time after the high has worn off, such as forgetfulness, lack of motivation, apathy, and general emotional fucked-uppedness.

Not noticed so much in occasional users, but very obvious in those who buy Zig-Zags by the case.

Herbal Alzheimer's looks like Tommy Chong at his peak before his first weed of the day.

herbal Alzheimer's by da Graybeard August 6, 2009

Agzheimer's 

When people called Agmar has Alzheimer's

- Did you hear Agmar got Alzheimer's.

- No, he got Agzheimer's.

Agzheimer's by DemilSpotify March 16, 2022