Skip to main content

How Christians Read the Bible

By presupposing it's truth and then create a narrative that is parallel to the text and then accepting this adjacent narrative AS TRUTH... Regardless of what the text actually says.
Hym "And then what they do is believe the narrative that is constructed around the text... In spite of the FACT that it is a manifestation of their own mind. So, it doesn't matter WHAT YOU SAY... As long as the conclusion is that the religion is both true and good. And it looks something like this:

Dr. JeepJorp "Flabbity florbity flip flop! Everyone KNOWS that flabbity florbity flip flop and that = the Bible true and good!"

Sheeple "Hey! I'm everyone! You're right! I know that, I mean, come on. Do you think I don't know that flabbity florbity flip flop? Everyone know it!"

Hym "And that's how Christians read the Bible."
by Hym Iam June 14, 2024
mugGet the How Christians Read the Biblemug.

Virginia reading

The verbiage used when someone from Virginia residues in a different state and a person needs to be told the hard, cold truth due to ugly behavior.
"I'm fixin to cuss you Virginia reading style if you don't get outta my face"
by navyvett October 11, 2013
mugGet the Virginia readingmug.

Reading schools

A ghetto school filled with ghetto people having ghetto fights and ghetto language.

Rachet skanks, poor school. Rude teachers And students!
They have no respect for nothing, they probably go to one of the reading schools.
by Black bitch 360 December 5, 2021
mugGet the Reading schoolsmug.

Reading the tea leaves

When you predict gossip.

Typically used in conjunction with “spill the tea

Alternate version “Reading the spilled tea leaves”
I can’t believe you knew about all that gossip before she spilled the tea, you were reading the tea leaves for sure
by hey__suburbia May 22, 2021
mugGet the Reading the tea leavesmug.

if you're reading this

an unusually fancy way of saying "there are good news and bad news", except its mostly manipulated into thinking its bad
Hello, if you're reading this, it's too late. I have eaten half of the cake you wanted to give to your friend Ronald because it was red velvet. You can't make me puke it out this time. Sincerely, James
by finally i found a name February 17, 2025
mugGet the if you're reading thismug.

I aint reading allat

An excuse a toddler uses as an excuse for the fact that they are unable to read
Person 1: (types 3 sentences in response to an argument with person 2)
Person 2: goo goo ga ga mf bitch I aint reading allat 🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️
by HauntedMalk January 29, 2024
mugGet the I aint reading allatmug.

Share this definition