Tardex

A pharmaceutical product sold in health food stores and marketed to athletes and bodybuilders. It comes in the form of powder which can be mixed with juice to provide "Super Retard Strength" to the user. Users of Tardex® report a drastic increase in physical strength for a period of several hours, usually accompanied by a marked decrease in mental capacity and an increase of salivary activity.

Tardex® powder comes in large, 1 kg. canisters and is generally mixed with apple juice. The instruction label is divided into "before use" and "after use" sections. The first part advises on proper dosage and recommends that the user wear a hockey helmet, The "after use" section, printed in 36 pt. type, simply stating "No! No! No! No touch! Bad! Bad! Go Away!"

"Super Retard Strength," a trademarked phrase of Downs Pharmaceuticals, Inc., has been frequently attacked as derogatory by the ARC and similar advocacy groups, playing upon the supposedly-abnormal muscular strength of mentally retarded people. Also, the claim that its active ingredient is "pure Seattle brain water" is disputed.

The U.S. Olympic Commission stripped the gold medal from the athlete for illegal use of Tardex, having been tipped off by the drool streaks on his jersey.

by Timotheus325 February 23, 2008

Avant Tard

It's for all those times when the art snobbery of a piece reaches such high levels that the feeble attempts made at being "exotic" or "ground breaking" just lands the artist squarely in the realm of retardation.

"I went to this new art gallery last week but it was so Avant Tard that it hurt!"

by Alienswede September 17, 2008

tard sauce

This sauce is every tard fam member's favorite sauce. It makes sense that it is their favorite because it seems to enhance the tard factor in each of them after being consumed. They do not have access to this sauce daily as it is a foreign substance but when a tard does get access to it, they will go crazy on the sauce. With weed, dabs are extremely potent, tard sauce is similar as it is the most potent influence and will cause many tard-outs. This sauce is peanut sauce.

Henry: Yo, since we're ordering Thai tonight, make sure we ask for a side of tard sauce, I mean peanut sauce, so we can satisfy our local tard fam member.

by TurnM3Up December 30, 2020

tard guard

another name for people who take care of mentally handicapped kids and prevent them from harming them selves or others.

johnny got a job with the tard guard, then he got pooped on

by bobby brown75 July 3, 2006

lard tard

A person who is both fat and stupid. A dumb lardass.

That woman is a fatty, and she is really dim and dumb. That makes her a lard tard.

by PMax January 11, 2009

meth tard

N. Person whose relationship (of any kind) to meth directly results in mind-numbingly stupid or tard-like behavior; an otherwise seemingly capable person whose use of meth reduces them to near unimaginable levels of mental incapication and social dysfunction; someone whose desire to produce and deal meth takes them into uncharted territories of uncoordinated and potentially dangerous recklessness.

Power was out all over town when a meth tard driving his portable meth lab ran smack into a sub-station while trying to out run the police and light his pipe at the same time.

by Truman Starr September 10, 2005

tard squad

(derogatory) Technically, a group of retarded people. But the term is usually used to describe a group of people considered to be dorks, idiots or weirdos. Also used as an insult by suggesting that someone is a member of said squad and should be riding the short bus to school. See also tard.

Man, check out Leisure Suit over there... is he auditioning for the tard squad or something?

by YodaDoe January 24, 2005