Hand Crank

A reference to pleasurable male masturbation. Jacking off. Wanking one out. Fapping.

Where's Brian? Still in the bathroom? Yea I'm sure he's doing a hand crank.

by Eaton Holgoode April 7, 2017

raging crank

A hard, raging, erect penis that is ready to slice some tender pussy.

She could see my raging crank through my suit pants & I knew she was ready for it.

by Korgkronosx August 25, 2015

spite crank

When you are so angry about something you find a camera, security or otherwise, and masturbate furiously, staring into the camera the entire time.

David was arrested last night, he was mad somebody took the last box of oreos at the store and began to spite crank into the first security camera he saw.

by Toouglyforporn July 10, 2019

Resting Crank Face

The beatific expression of an extremist - either on the left or the right - who holds opinions that only they and their crank-friends subscribe to. Resting crank face can involve smiling benignly, while spouting crank theories to crank comrades 'The moon landings were faked by Stanley Kubrick' or 'The illuminati is controlling Congress' or 'The Joos did 9/11'

When Jacob Rees-Mogg talks about Brexit a little smile plays around his lips and he becomes the poster boy of the Resting Crank Face.

Have you never noticed how much Jeremy Corbyn grins when he's standing under a Hezbollah banner? That's his Resting Crank Face.

"Wow, what's he got to smile about - he's holding a sign that says 'The holocaust was exaggerated'?"
"That's his Resting Crank Face."

"How come Julian Assange's face always looks that way?"
"He has a natural Resting Crank Face."

by Mrs Nuddering September 23, 2019

hydrolyzed crank

Slang for Methamphetamine

Speed Cola contains hydrolyzed crank

by RoseRed669 January 18, 2023

Anger crank

The act of furiously masturbating due too something that made you mad.

Man, this is pissing me off, I’m about to go anger crank.

by Masjfo January 30, 2023

The Capuchin Crank

A form of torture commonly used by the CIA as an interrogation method, in which an intelligent primate (commonly a capuchin monkey) is trained to twist a mans penis until he passes out.

Bro, I can't believe that they gave Pablo The Capuchin Crank until he gave up the location of our stash!

by XxGlizzyGoblinxX October 9, 2020