Safety Scotch 

Similar to Safety Beer but for those with more serious drinking problems. It's Saturday night and you haven't made plans yet so you stop by the liquor store and buy a bottle of Glen Parker to get you through any after hours activities. Real men plan ahead and buy a 12 pack of Glen Parker which could eliminate the need to make extra trips to the liquor store for bottles of Scotch on following weekends.

"Anyone getting together for Rock Band or a toga party later tonight? I'll stop by Spec's and pick up a bottle of Glen Parker Safety Scotch just in case."

Safety Scotch by Bugsy McDingle November 3, 2011

Scotchy Meter 

The Scale that shows how scotchy someone is. At the top of the scale is the Scotchy Mother, then Pork Scotch. The Meter shows that no one in the Scotchy World is as Scotchy as The Scotchy Mother. She is even more scotchy than THE Pork Scotch.

Scotchy Mother: I'm the Scotchiest person in the world. The Scotchy Meter says so. I'm even Scotchier than my son, he'll never beat me.

Pork Scotch: Yes I will, Mum. Don't forget I'm a Koala.

Scotchy Meter by Ednatoast Jeeganflipperwick July 28, 2009

scotch toss 

Scotch toss is a beach game, in which players toss a closed scotch bottle (possibly filled with a mixer) at one another, while standing in the ocean. If a player catches the bottle, he must drink. If a player drops the bottle, they must take two drinks.

I can't go out, I played scotch toss on the beach last night and feel awful.

scotch toss by dbqpvr March 10, 2018

Pork Scotch

A short, stocky man with a shaved head. Close to pensionable age but believes himself to be young and with-it. Drives a small white van. He thinks its cool to cook food outside with his drag-act "girlfriend", believing that sharing a garlic bread at a green plastic table is all that is required for a barbecue. Also known as Mr Boring, Mr Ugly and The Arsehole.

Pork Scotch is a total twat
Its gay to wear a buffalo hat
Your girlfriend's really a man in drag
Your boring face makes people gag

Pork Scotch by Benny Twadge April 18, 2009

sloth job 

an exotic form of a handjob that is done extremely slowly. Sloth jobs should last between 2.5-4 hours, as if a sloth was giving it. It must be given with 2-3 fingers and while the person giving the sloth job is hanging from a canopy or bunk bed. After completion, the one performing the job slowly "climbs" their way to the top bunk or out a nearby window. Optional things to do during a sloth job include eating leafy vegetation and making sloth mating noises sporadically.

That girl's wrist must be so sore after giving me a sloth job last night.

sloth job by 8InchesOfPain November 25, 2011

Pork Scotch

A boring old man that has a shaved head where there is a bald spot at the top-back and the hair surrounding it is spirally. Pork Scotch is the name of the hairstyle but the bloke is called a Pork Scotch aswell.When the boring old bastard speaks to you, you feel suicidal with boredom. He wears a cowboy hat-shaped buffalo skin hat. He has terrible tast in clothing, he sits outside in the back garden and thinks its cool and fun to have a bbq evryday wearing a hawaiian-like shirt with horrible, boring shorts reading a paper with his wife that looks like a man in drag. Pork Scotch is also known as Mr Boring, Mr Ugly, and The Arsehole. His real name is Max (AKA Pork Scotch)

MONK: Look at The Arsehole. The clothes are terrible! Ugly, Ugly old bastard!
DAD: I know. Look, he´s sitting at the table in the garden with his back to us so we get a good view of the Pork Scotch

Pork Scotch by Ednatoast Jeeganflipperwick April 26, 2009

Slothalothaphobia 

The fear of all sloths and any of its relatives, such as the armadillo

'Fancy coming to the zoo with me?'
'Sure but we need to stay away from the sloths'
'How come?'
'Mate I got some slothalothaphobia'

Slothalothaphobia by Sloth guy December 23, 2012