Microsoftian

A 'Microsoftian' view is one that only supports what is already desired; disingenuous and pretentious at the same time.

Can be applied outside Microsoft discussions.

Slang, offensive.

See also 'formwhoring'.

"Please select which program you use for office documents:
A Microsoft Office 2000
B Microsoft Office 97
C Microsoft Office Pro
D Microsoft ...
E Microsoft ...
F Microsoft ...
G Microsoft ..."

('Microsoftian' in that you can only choose 'Microsoft' from the list. This list does not allow users to select 'Star Office', 'Open Office', 'Applixware', etc., all of which are office software suites that are in current use but are also NOT Microsoft software.)

And

"He said he wanted Chinese take out, but his Microsoftian demeanor during discussions left us no choice but to get italian take-out."

by mmmna September 21, 2007

Micronut

An orgasm that occurs faster than a quickie, ideally in less than sixty seconds. It typically does not cause enough damage to require the changing of undergarments. It is often followed by a micronap.

Lauren offered Sal a hander, but he responded, "Sorry, that won't do, I only have time for a micronut."

"I don't have time for foreplay, but I'd sure take a micro."

by Kevin Muscoreil June 18, 2014

microsoft paint

A paint tool program you use when you need pictures to go along with your Roblox fanfiction

"Why are you looking up the definition of Microsoft Paint on Urban Dictionary."

by Galactic_Pyro April 19, 2018

Microsoft

A large terrorist organisation, hell bent on producing software that crashes and works slowly. Some of their more evil tactics over the years include waiting until just before you click the save button to make the screen go all blue for no reason, but more subtle tactics include waiting until you start to work, then annoying you with a sodding paper clip.

Josh: "I'll just get on with some work..."
Microsoft Paperclip: "Hello!"
Josh: *I'll just ignore him, and he'll go away*.... *starts to type*
Microsoft Paperclip: "Do you want to write a letter?"
Josh: "No."
Microsoft Paperclip: "Okay, do you need some help with that?"
Josh: "NO! NO! NO I DONT FUCKING WANT SOME HELP! PISS OFF!!"
*clicks on hide, paperclip dissapears*...*begins to work...*

... 2 minutes pass ...

Microsoft Paperclip: "Hello!"

by RICCARD October 9, 2005

Microsoft minute

Microsoft minute
dats-uh-lawng-tahym

noun
1. any amount of time that is significantly longer than a minute.

2. a period of time that is longer than projected or promised.
3. any amount of time spent while staring at spinning circles, especially when something is expected to happen afterwards.

I waited in line at the DMV for what felt like a Microsoft minute.

by Bancheis January 25, 2017

Microsoft Security Essentials

Something from Microsoft that actually works

I rid my computer of vundo using Microsoft Security Essentials

by 1033955456596542 March 21, 2010

Microsoft Works

1) Word processing program by the Microsoft Corporation

2) Oxymoron

1) Microsoft Works sucks, I'm going to get a bootlegged copy of Office.

2) Microsoft works? No it doesn't.

by Nick April 3, 2003