Pseudocidal

Dramatic exaggerated harmless attempt at suicide, rarely successful, and not meant to actually result in death, but to garner attention.

That crayzee emo patient in room 14 said he wanted to kill himself, his plan was to overdose on 4 tylenol. He's "pseudocidal"

by Nurse Wretched March 14, 2012

Pseudochef

A wannabe chef working as a cook at a chain.

Pseudochef

A cook at Olive Garden, Chili's, Applebee's or any other chain restaurant.

by INCOGNITO2011 May 25, 2012

pseudocider

A person who constantly threatens to commit suicide to get attention while being too scared to actually do it

Ron has been a pseudocider for months. Each time a girl breaks up with him, he says he's going to end it all, but he never does.

by DJMarcusA September 6, 2021

Pseudoscience

Formerly a descriptor for practices claiming to be scientific with no evidence in favor of the practice, the term "Pseudoscience" has unfortunately devolved into a catch-all pejorative term for anything that doesn't align with the majority opinion of self-proclaimed "intellectuals" who will create 1500+ word essays on why you're wrong and why you should "TRUST THE SCIENCE". Because of the modern redefinition of the term, several harmless beliefs and hobbies (eg. Cryptozoology, Astrology, Ufology) have been lumped into the same category as absolutely braindead theories that even fetuses would be able to identify as bullshit (eg. Flat earth), or genuinely dangerous beliefs and practices (eg. Horse Dewormer and Bleach as "cures" for COVID and other related quackery). Science actually sometimes relies on "Pseudoscientific" practices to make new breakthroughs. For example, Plate tectonics used to be given no credibility, but are now generally accepted.

The term is now systemically abused heavily on Wikipedia due to said site's high reliance on secondary sources. Said secondary sources (mostly editorials on popular news magazine websites) heavily abuse the term "pseudoscience", especially when talking about those who are politically right-wing (while ignoring left-wing pseudoscientific, or at least denialist movements such as the anti-GMO or anti-nuclear energy movements).

Person 1: Hey, check out this cool cryptid book i got!
Person 2: Aww sweet! My favorite is the Bunyip, i wonder what it'll look li-
"Expert": ACKSHUALLY CRYPTOZOOLOGY IS PSEUDOSCIENCE AND IF YOU FOLLOW IT YOU ARE A RIGHT WING ANTI-MASK NAZI WHO THINKS THE EARTH IS FLAT
Persons 1 and 2: Dude wtf

by PNurBH June 6, 2023

PseudoCybernation

The act of justifying one's electronic unavailability, in the event of not wanting to be contacted (or simply scheming to not answer phone calls, text messaging SMS, email, Facebook Wall posts, or IM's from friends, family, coworkers, the usual stalker, etc), with semi-credible platitudes.

This can be successfully achieved by placing the blame of such non-responsiveness on a shortfall in cell phone signal, end-of-life of current battery charge, accidental switching into vibrate/silent mode, and plethora of difficulties related to WiFi.

All aforementioned alibis have a nice ring-of-truth, and there is no way your mom, your annoying 16-year old sister, your friend Steve/Heather (who only calls to ask for a ride or to borrow cash or score some of your weed), or that creepy dude from last Thursday's party whom you FB-friended when you were too drunk, can prove otherwise.

i
Mom: Mijo, I kept calling last night. I made hígado encebollado, nopales con verdolagas and lentejas, just like we do every Tuesday.

You: Darn, mom, I can't believe I missed that awesome banquet. You know, it must've been when I placed the phone on vibrate earlier to go on PseudoCybernation from Steve. Sorry I couldn't get your call.

(Bonus!)
Mom: I tried to leave you a voice message, but your mailbox is full.

You: Yea, I know. Thing is, I'm waiting for Verizon to do away with their stupid limit of 25 voicemails, so I'm protesting by keeping my inbox full.

ii
Your friend Steve: Hey bro, I txtd you last night man! These two honeys wanted to get down, but they live all the way down in San Ysidro. I was thinking maybe you could be designated driver since you're doing that Lent thing. Wha happen yo?

You: Aww, man! Really?? I was out all day doing errands with my lil sis for her Science Fair project, but I didn't have my car charger with me, so my Droid died ‘cause I was using it to GPS navigate around North Park, and the Google Maps App literally sucked the life out of the poor battery. I couldn't recharge until I got back from dropping her off at my parents'.

(Bonus!)
Your friend Steve: But dude, you're usually in and out of there like good weather in Indiana!

You: Yea man, but my mom begged me to try her Tuesday Special...

Your friend Steve: Oh snap! Is she still cooking that nasty liver with all that crazy green stuff?

You: ugh... don't remind me...

by icaito March 14, 2010

Pseudodeep

The most diverse band in Seekonk, MA.

Yo Pseudodeep is like the melting pot of Seekonk. Or like a panda bear. Black, white, and asian.

by CreeCreeManti December 19, 2016

Pseudocumentary

Any documentary that;

. Uses logical leaps to connect unrelated events that create an over-arching narrative that, in turn, supports a nebulous conclusion.

Uses panning overhead shots of American suburbia.
Uses vintage footage of UNIVAC computers, prozac capsules, Air Force personnel firing missiles, a smiling blonde woman, the Bikini Atoll tests, Gadaff, Reagan, Saddam Hussein and Tony Blair.
Uses Beethoven's 7th or Philip Glass' Pruit Igoe to usher a sense of techno-fear and existential foreboding.
Tries to incorporate computers, Utopia, Prozac, Psychiatry, Market-driven political policy, suicide bombers and Tony Blair into some overrarching 'scheme'
Appeals to left-leaning, chin-stroking hipsters pseuds fond of using the Courtier's Reply - ' you just don't get it'.

Taxi Driver: There's that documentary about how computers caused the financial crash, and it might have some Beethoven and Prozac in it. Maybe Tony Blair grinning like the Satanic bastard we all know he is, ha!
Bus Driver; Oh yeah, and somehow get poor man's Nietzsche Ayn Rand shoehorned in, along with Gadaffi, Brexit and the Smurfs in for good measure. No thanks fella, i have better stuff to watch than a pseudocumentary. He-Man is on Netflix

by Klaatu's Nikto November 29, 2017