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Condomentia

Condomentia: full form: condom dementia. (N) A specific state of late-stage cognitive and/or psychological decline that manifests in insane, inaccurate, and dangerous claims, most notably by the Pope, that condoms increase, instead of help prevent, the spread of STDs.
Example: "The Vatican reported today that the Pope's condomentia has worsened considerably in recent weeks, accounting for his outrageous claim that condoms increase the spread of AIDS. They apologize for the inconvenience."
by cayrez March 18, 2009
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paper butt condom

The paper used in public restrooms that acts as a protective layer between the bare cheeks of a human and the often urinated, deficated, disgusting toilet seat.
I thought to myself, "Fuckin' shit man, this toilet seat is nasty, better protect my fat ass with a paper butt condom."
by Rubb Dogg June 14, 2009
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condom

Hey baby, I'm gonna put on a condom so as not to spill the spooge in ya.
by lonestar August 4, 2004
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Condom Magic Trick

When Your Banging A Girl While Wearing A Condom And When You Pull It Out The Condom's Gone!
Jeff:Yo! I Pulled A Condom Magic Trick on Alice Last Night!
George:Awesome!
by Seagulls Of Santa!!! October 10, 2008
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condom roulette

A military mess game where a number of condoms are filled with shots but one with spunk. The person is blidfolded, then has to choose a condom & drink it's contents!
The Officers played Condom Roulette after their meal
by Boltaction November 16, 2007
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Condom Connoisseur

One who knows his or her way around the condom section on the local drug store to a frightening degree….
Have you ever seen that episode of Aqua teen hunger force where they use a ray to enlarge Carl‘s genitals and crabs start crawling out of his shorts? He is NOT a Condom Connoisseur.
by umpa lumpa Dude July 5, 2006
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Condom

Gets a call from a woman. Woman: Hello... Remember the night 9 months ago?
Man: No?
Woman: We had sex...
Man: Aaah... Nice. So you want to do it again?
Woman: The reason why I am calling is to tell you that you have a son.
Man: I am pretty sure I would have known if I had a son, and I guarantee you that I don't have one.
Woman: Enough jokes, funny guy. Your son came out of my stomach last night.
Man: What? But I always use a condom when I have sex... How is that possible?
Woman: Are you saying our son wasn't wanted? You even said you loved me and that you wanted to marry me.
Man: I must really have been drunk that night.
Woman: Get ready to pay child support.
*man shoots himself*
by ad diction August 16, 2012
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