Turds of Poseidon

The Turds of Poseidon is a prank to save for the most terrible of offenders, much like the Upper Decker.

You take raw, uncooked shrimp, and find ways to hide them in places the target will not be able to discover. For obvious reasons, this is a difficult prank to execute as you need unfettered access to their living space, no witnesses, and perhaps a small multi-tool (for opening and closing air vents and whatnot)

Air vents, underneath toilet tanks, under sinks, hidden in cushions, bedding, curtain poles, the sky's the limit. Use you imagination. Remember, the goal is for them to NEVER be found, thus ensuring maximum stink.

Good luck, and use responsibly.

Prima was furious at Secunda for fucking his bitch. Little did Secunda suspect, that Prima had a key to Secunda's apartment.

Vengeance would be his! For he had a weapon few dared use. It's power, foul. It's use, forbidden. It's stench, legendary.

He would unleash... The Turds of Poseidon!

by Frank Marlowe January 26, 2014

turdsmirk

Facial expression after crapping yourself and at the same time enjoying the warm cosy feeling.

"My god it smells in here, it must've been Joe, look at his turdsmirk."

by BoomScooter November 19, 2009

ratta-tatta turds

When turds are expelled from someone’s anus in the manner of machine gunfire.

I could hear him from more than a block away shitting his signature ratta-tatta turds!

by Dr Bunnygirl May 30, 2021

turdular

descriptive of all things relating to shit.

That tramp smells a bit turdular, this fucking job is turdular, thats a turdular looking obstruction in my bog you are a fucking turdular retard

by mr pissflaps March 1, 2004

bleeding turds

This is military slang for someone with severe abdominal injuries from an explosion or machinegun.

Man, he was so blown to shit he was bleeding turds!

by I, Wreckerrr April 12, 2021

Sand Turds

Yet another term for radical Islamic Militant types.

"The world would be a much better place without Sand Turds"

by The Real Jemezman August 4, 2009

turdshine

to polish the crap until salable. Usually applies to making something appear more desirable than it really is when in reality it is a steaming pile of fecal mass. Can be used in any situation involving making things that suck look less suckier and passing them off as being the coolest fucking thing on earth.

"Time for a new update, lets just apply some turdshine to the old release and charge them for the higher version number."

"Congressman 1: How can we pass this bill that fucks over Americans?"
"Congressman 2: Lets rename the previously failed bill and try to pass it again!"
"Congressman 3: We owe our paychecks to turdshine."

by theantilulz November 5, 2011