meat bassoon

Old-musician slang for a dick.
Usually referenced as such when referring to oral sex.

"the first time I saw her,
she was playin' a tune,
in the orchestra pit,
on a MEAT bassoon."

copyright Doug Clark & hot nuts

by dave_CO February 6, 2007

bassoon

A bassoon is a musical instument that some say looks like a bong. Traditionally, it's made of wood, but they can be made of this crappy plastic stuff. (plastic bassoons don't sound near as nice as the wooden ones.)

Bassoons produce a dark rich tone in the hands of an experienced player. However, anyone else sounds like they're killing a large beast.

Bassoons require a double reed.

He started playing bassoon last October and sounded terrible, but now he's great!

by Janetjet March 20, 2005

bassoon

due to the nature of the instrument, bassoonists are quite good with their tongues.

Wow, you kiss like you play bassoon.

by satilo May 13, 2005

Rusty Bassoon

While a woman is performing fellatio on a man she makes honking noises and gives him a raspberry at the same time. Both hands should be massaging any and all parts of the man.

If the man farts while the rusty bassoon is being performed, it makes it that much better.

After a symphony concert...

Man: Hey, you played great tonight! Put your good bassoon away, and come back to my place. I uh have a bassoon I want you to blow on. It's a rusty bassoon though...

Woman: Oh OK? So it needs to be cleaned?

Man: Why yes, it does.

Woman: Sounds great!

by rusty bassoon August 30, 2009

Bassoon

A large wooden double reeded instrument that is often mistaken for an oboe by people that have absolutely no idea what they're talking about. Or, someone is resembling it to a bong. i have heard on numerous occasions, "farting bed post" and "potato shooter" the bassoon is by far the worlds most unique instrument and by far the coolest. eventhough it gets hated on much more than any other instrument.. ever. that is because everyone else is jealous.
this instrument produces a deep rich sound that if played incorrectly can sound like something is dying. which is why the majority of people should not play it. for in the wrong hands it sounds awful. in good hands of a skilled musician it has a beautiful sound. as long as its a wooden bassoon, they make them in plastic for student musiciains, i don't reccomend it.
the bassoon has 13 thumb keys. its rather intense and you really have to have skillful fingers to play a bassoon.
especially since you have to get used to holding some holes half way.
the bassoon is a base clef instrument that really brings in a quality base sound to the orchastra.

if you're looking at someone who is a bassoonist beware they're quick and will most likely kick your ass. That is if you harass the instrument they've spent way too many hours trying to perfect.
fantasia The Sorceer's Apprentice (with mickey mouse)
the main melody is all bassoon baby

joey: hey check out that huge pipe thing.
amy: thats an oboe i think...
kelsi: no dummy its a bassoon

by k2thespecial November 2, 2008

Bassoon

A large, very complicated bass woodwind instrument. Extremely frustrating to learn and even harder to master. Most who attempt give up because thumbs are not meant to move as fast as is needed to play it.
It is thought to have been designed by the devil himself.

John: Hey, man, you still playing that bassoon?

Joe: No, way! I gave it up weeks ago for something easy, a baritone

by MissBlackEyeLiner February 26, 2009

Bastion Booger

the funniest professional wrestler in the history of WWF. I saw him win a match by falling on his oponent, then he belched and ate a banana with his mouth open.

Bastion Booger rocks! Bring back Bastion Booger to the WWF

by Anonymous November 5, 2003