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absolutely jorkin my shit

A higher form of jorkin it usually in a communication form meaning to jack off in an aggressive manner
Yo I’m absolutely jorkin my shit right now and by it let’s just say my pentis
by The-jorkin-king January 13, 2025
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Hannibal Jorker

When you constantly goon and save your seed in little jars to put on food when you cook it.
Todd: Hey, what kinda butter is that?
John: this is my cum!
Todd: WTF, WHY! You’re … The Hannibal Jorker
by Za Wizard February 25, 2025
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Related Words
joork jooks jork joori Jooked Jorking jookie jookin jooky jorkin it

Chinese Jork Torture

When you are captured by an insurgent and they jork your shit with alcohol till it peels and then keep going till it bleeds.
"My boy Terry got Chinese Jork Tortured by his Ex, his meat was raw gang 😭😭"
by Lil Jork March 3, 2025
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Chinese Jork Torture

When you are captured by the CCP and to extract information from you they jerk your shit with 99% percent alcohol till it peels.
"Yo my buddy Jared got the Chinese Jork Torture the other day when he got caught flaming Xi Jingping on Douyin live."
by Lil Jork March 7, 2025
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Crim Jork

(noun, usually a person or moment, sometimes a compliment, often an insult)

Definition:
This is the full form. A Crim Jork is someone who thinks he’s got it all figured out — money, game, respect — but really he’s just riding vibes and luck. Sometimes delusional. Sometimes brilliant. Always polarizing. The kind of guy who will talk down to a cop while holding a blunt and somehow win the argument.

It’s also a term for a moment so wild, so chaotic, that it transcends reason.

Examples:

“Dude just lied to three girls at the bar, made out with all of them, then spilled beer on himself and said it was cologne. crim jork behavior.”

“That was a crim jork play if I’ve ever seen one. We charged him $700 for a plug-in install and he said thank you.”

“He’s a fucking crim jork — and I love him for it.”

HOW TO SPOT A CRIM JORK

Speaks confidently about things he learned 12 minutes ago

Casually throws around “business terms” while vaping

Has $300 in cash and a $1,500 iPhone but no car

Probably thinks his girl is ride-or-die but she’s just enabling his downfall

Might win the lottery and lose it all in a custom vape NFT rug pull
“Dude just lied to three girls at the bar, made out with all of them, then spilled beer on himself and said it was cologne. Crim Jork behavior.”

“That was a Crim Jork play if I’ve ever seen one. We charged him $700 for a plug-in install and he said thank you.”

“He’s a fucking crim jork — and I love him for it.”

COMBINED PHRASES

“Crim the Jork” – to push something to its most ridiculous success

“Jork of the Crim” – someone who acts chaotic in service of a bigger scheme

“Crim-Jork spiral” – when two people enable each other’s bad ideas into a perfect storm of degeneracy

“That’s not just jorkin’, that’s Crim Jorkin’” – moment so insane it can’t be topped

VERBAL STRUCTURE / USAGE

“Hit a crim” = pulled off a move that’s chaotic-good or chaotic-neutral

“Massive jork” = big win, unexpected flex, dumb genius moment

“Head Crim” = head of the table, shot caller, delusional mastermind

“Full jork mode” = no thoughts, only action

“Crimmed it” = achieved something through obscure and questionable methods

“Jorked out” = exhausted or overstimulated from high-risk behavior

“Crim energy” = bold, scummy, hot-headed confidence
by The Crim Jorks June 6, 2025
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straight up "jorking it"

What you do at the stripped club with your peanits
i was at the stripped club last knight, and. i couldn't resist the urge to strart straight up "jorking it". you shouldev seen the look, on. My peanits
by Mlum April 15, 2024
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Hey Mordecai, how about you jork me

MM:Hey Mordecai, how about you jork me off?
Mordecai:No bro it's kinda gay
Rigby:You're kinda gay, and then kinda like a f*g.
MM:YOU DID NOT JUST CALL ME A F*G.
you know who else called me a f*g? my mom.
Skips:I've seen this before. you called him a f*g too many times.
MORDECAI, RIGBY, WE HAVE TO DO CAKE FARTS FOR MM TO CHEER HIM UP.
Mordecai:I don't think i wanna do that.
Benson:Mordecai, Rigby, you're gonna do cake farts for MM or you're FIRED!!
Hey Mordecai, how about you jork me off?

Mordecai:No bro it's kinda gay
by YADEAD July 22, 2025
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