Monkey's Paw 

A "monkeys paw" is when you're taking a shower and you're out of wash cloths Once you get to washing your ass, you soap up your hand and get down there to clean it all out with that soapy bare hand. You're then left with a clean ass but in return, no matter how much you clean that hand, it feels dirty for the rest of the day.

I cant eat tacos today, I gave myself a Monkey's paw this morning and I forgot which hand it was.

Monkey's Paw by Dandalorian December 15, 2022

monkey-type 

(adj.) Used to positively refer to something interesting or noteworthy, synonymous with "cool" or "awesome"

Derived from the internet's cultural obsession with monkeys

"Mom, you made some real monkey-type casserole last night!"
"HOLY SHIT DUDE! That was a straight up monkey-type kickflip!"

monkey-type by Cityo51 January 2, 2023

Monkey Moment 

A short period of time where all logical, common sensical, and reasonable thinking ceases to exist.

Elijah: says to officer who pulled him over* You're the same cop who pulled me over last time!
Officer: *looks at Elijah like he's retarded*
Dylan: You know, I really thought he might have just let us off with a warning until you said the stupidest shit I've ever heard you say
Elijah: Sorry, I just had a Monkey Moment

Monkey Moment by euheuc January 2, 2023

monkey twisted 

a monkey spin - used in an act of sabotage to make a functional thing dysfunctional

secretive sabotage: ... airplanes had been monkey twisted in a way that caused them to crash ...

monkey twisted by jona(h) li, jona-li.eu January 15, 2023

Monkey Alchemist 

A monkey in Bloons TD 6 that throws acidulous potions at the Bloons, giving out a damage over time effect onto them but also has upgrades that can buff other towers, turn lead bloons into gold and much more.

"I only use the Monkey Alchemist to buff my monkeys specifically, mainly Perma-Brew for lategame and Cookie Monster isn't a good ability for Alchemist Monkey since it can't handle Zoh My Gods very well."

Monkey Alchemist by Otheruser325 January 15, 2023

monkey nut

like a dumbass who acts like a monkey would

alternatively, what a british person would call peanuts because they give them to monkeys in the zoo

"ayo monkey nut come get over here"
"this kids a fuckin monkey nut"
random:"fuck you monkey nut" you:"the fuck you say to me cuh??"

alt: "can i get some monkey nuts please"

monkey nut by teachannnn January 20, 2023

monkey slander 

When someone says strait cap

this Spanish test is monkey slander

monkey slander by crewvila January 31, 2023