SYNONYMS: chokin' the chicken, spanking the monkey, flogging the dolphin, beating off, jackin' off, buffing the banana, wanking off, playing with yourself, tootin' your horn, fighting the purple helmet warrior, rubbing the one-eyed snake, commiting spermi

Some neurosurgeon posted a definition for masturbate with a bunch of synonyms and decided it would be a good idea to make them all one big link, which is how you got here to this page. Here's to that genius.

I hope that person catches AIDS from masturbating.



SYNONYMS: chokin' the chicken, spanking the monkey, flogging the dolphin, beating off, jackin' off, buffing the banana, wanking off, playing with yourself, tootin' your horn, fighting the purple helmet warrior, rubbing the one-eyed snake, commiting spermicide, taking your turn at the self-serve station, fishing with your zipper trout, beating the shit out of your midget friend, makin' mayo, polishing the family jewels, test-firing the old meat missle, wrapping the hand around the penis and moving it in a thrusting movement.

by Catamount June 21, 2008

wankiest

Of the poorest quality, of the lowest standard, the worst.

It was wankiest film I've seen all year and to think I wasted $5 on a ticket and 3 hours of my life.

by VAKI5 May 7, 2005

Wankatank

Aus. slang
Four wheel drives that never leave the bitumen. Mostly found on the Mornington Peninsula but occuring in other parts of Australia:

"Those wankatank drivers should all have to undergo appropriate training to be licenced to drive."

by Gari August 26, 2005

wankinism

The time-honored act of masturbating.

"Hey ease off, bud, she's MINE! Why don't you go take up wankinism??"

by schist August 12, 2006

wanksta

50 cent is a wanksta. he has been shot but he ain't never done any shootin.

50 cent is calling jarule a wanksta but really he 50 is also a wanksta

by mos def and talib kweli are blackstar March 11, 2005

wankathon

An extended and rigorous session of masturbation with a duration of not less than 8 hours. Short breaks not exceeding 2 minutes at a stretch are allowed to take care of other personal needs such as bathroom breaks and urgent incoming phone calls. One of the feature points of a wankathon is to control the ejaculation, as otherwise there would not be any wankathon.

Santosh is having an all-night internet chat wankathon.

by Santosh July 30, 2008

wanking claw

Deformed hand used primarily for wanking. Can be used in many jokes.

Damian: What is happening over there
Thomas Kiely: Nothing, im just itchy
Everyone: No, He's masterbating
Louis: Wanking Claw!

by Tyler Williams June 18, 2006