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Just because you're on a diet, doesn't mean that you can't look at the menu

Meaning that if you already have a girlfriend/lover, doesn't mean that you can't check out other girls.
Guy #1: Hey look at those chicks over there!
Guy #2: Buddy, I already have a girlfriend.
Guy #1: Just because you're on a diet, doesn't mean that you can't look at the menu.
Guy #2: I suppose you're right. *Gazes at girls for 5 minutes* Damn! This is like Baywatch!
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I eat my cereal with water because my dad never came back with the milk 

The meaning of the father not bringing back milk is a very sad story. I have no idea why it's called milk, but when a dad breaks up with his family and leaves his partner, he'll say that he's going to the store to buy milk but then he never comes back. Depression spirals. You have a mental breakdown. The phrase 'I eat my cereal with water because my dad never came back with the milk' Is used as a joke or a way to break the news to someone. I'd rather go get my own milk 😤
Person 1: Make me cry
Person 2: I eat my cereal with water because my dad never came back with the milk
Person 1: 😭😭😭😢😥😰😭😓😩😫🤤😭😭😭😭😭😭

is it because i'm black?

Originally the title of a song by US soul artist Syl Johnson.
Subsequently sampled by many hip hop artists including:

Cypress Hill - "Interlude"
Ghostface Killah - "?"
Wu-Tang Clan - "Hollow Bones"

Maybe because I've ALWAYS been faithful to you while you've cheated on me like six times, BITCH.

^Words of wisdom by Ted Mosby, when telling the "truth" about Karen. His first girlfriend.
"Maybe because I've ALWAYS been faithful to you while you've cheated on me like six times, BITCH."
^What he should have said.

Shut your ass because you're talking out of it 

Something you say to somebody who is talking total crap.
Mate, shut your ass because you're talking out of it.

just tell peppy you couldn't do a barrel roll because you were too busy getting stoned 

Just because I can 

1.the excuse for anything that was either stupid random or both.
2.why I'm writing this definition
Why'd did you smoke that weed right in front of a cop
Just because I can
Really?!?