The morbidly obese man that breaks into houses every year on December 24th and eats all of the food in your house. If you ever see him in your house, run. Santa Claus will give out presents to kids that he finds attractive and the ugly ones get coal. The presents usually have trackers in them as he handmade them with his children slaves that he kidnapped, also known as “elves”
Sometimes you may find some very small elves in your house. Dispose of them immediately because they have cameras in them. Santa isn’t your friend. He’s a child predator.
Sometimes you may find some very small elves in your house. Dispose of them immediately because they have cameras in them. Santa isn’t your friend. He’s a child predator.
*kid wakes up*
oh my goodness it’s santa claus and he is in my room
santa claus: ho ho ho get in my fabric sack
kid: *climbs into fabric sack*
santa claus: hahaha now you are my elf
kid: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
*the kid was forced to make toys until the end of time*
oh my goodness it’s santa claus and he is in my room
santa claus: ho ho ho get in my fabric sack
kid: *climbs into fabric sack*
santa claus: hahaha now you are my elf
kid: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
*the kid was forced to make toys until the end of time*
by SteeringWheelFaceReveal June 12, 2023
Get the Santa Clausmug. A western Pennsylvania term. It means to initiate plans for a later date, then not show up or follow through with the plans.
Jim pulled a Claus again on me. That asshole called me and told me he had tickets to the Donnie Iris show for Saturday down at Nick's Fat City. I sat around all night waiting for that asshole to show up. That fucker's always pulling a Claus on me.
by Rick Beggs April 20, 2011
Get the Pulling a Clausmug. by john stromboli January 3, 2021
Get the sanny clausmug. Most Known as *Hitler from Christmas* Santa Claus is a big fat dick elder, that sometimes acts kinda pedophile by eating his elf´s ass and pussy.
ELF - Heyooooo!!!! IT IS SANTA CLAUS EAT MY ASS SWOOOOWOOOO OUUWEEEEE.^
Santa - NEIN, GEHT AUF DIR BITCH!!!
Santa - NEIN, GEHT AUF DIR BITCH!!!
by Santa claus pedophile??? nein December 26, 2021
Get the Santa Clausmug. Most likely a mythical modern retelling of a mystic group of hallucinogenic mushroom-eating Siberian shaman who wore red and white outfits, snuck in through the chimneys of villagers and distributed the sacred mushroom Amanita Muscaria. Other associations from the popular myth easily fall into place. The reindeer is the animal most associated with Amanita as it is a popular dish to them. Amanita tends to form a symbotic relationship with spruce or pine trees which are used for Christmas trees. It is also said that the Siberian shaman could fly, but probably not physically. However, Amanita often gives the sensation of flying.
by Requiett September 6, 2005
Get the santa clausmug. Evil robot who terrorizes the citizens of New New York every X-mas Eve, because he judges everyone to be naughty. He throws grenades that look like X-mas tree ornaments and shot a TOW missile at Fry and Leela when he caught them under mistletoe. One time, he got frozen in the ice of Neptune due to the exhaust from the Planet Express ship melting the ice and it refroze. Bender then had to take his place that X-mas eve.
Amy: "You can't stay out on X-Mas eve, you'll be killed!"
Fry: "Say what?"
Farnsworth: "Good lord! he doesn't know about Santa Claus."
Fry: "Say what?"
Farnsworth: "Good lord! he doesn't know about Santa Claus."
by MontgomeryGator February 6, 2007
Get the santa clausmug. Someone adults made up and tell their children he delivers all the presents on Christmas Eve. He supposably lives in the North Pole with all his lil elves making toys and Mrs. Jessica Claus. Obviously he does not exist because the inpersonators you see at the mall and such would be arrested for identity theft. So what is the point of him? To give children something to believe in and spread Christmas spirit around. Becasue of him now people don't even know what Christmas really is all about and just want gifts. What does Santa Claus have to do with he birth of God?
He comes down the chimney, which isn't practical since he is apparently really fat.
He comes down the chimney, which isn't practical since he is apparently really fat.
Adult: Go to sleep early Cindy Lou Who, or Santa Clause won't come!
Cindy Lou Who: OK mommy/daddy, don't forget to leave out cookies and milk for Santa and carrots for his magical reindeer you told me about. I cant believe they can fly, pull his sleigh with his fat body and everybody on the nice list's presents and naughty lists coal!!!! Night night!
Cindy Lou Who: OK mommy/daddy, don't forget to leave out cookies and milk for Santa and carrots for his magical reindeer you told me about. I cant believe they can fly, pull his sleigh with his fat body and everybody on the nice list's presents and naughty lists coal!!!! Night night!
by Young Gothic Rocker Chic December 28, 2005
Get the Santa Clausmug.