urban pervert's definitions

woodpecker

A hard penis.

I stabbed her a new hole with my Woody Woodpecker.

by urban pervert April 4, 2003

Mistress

Spare pussy to have when your wife or girlfriend is either on the rag or just not in the mood to straddle the cock. Traditionally a popular stress reliever in France, which might explain why they rarely wage wars these days.

After my wife tried the old "I have a headache" tactic for avoiding sex, I hopped over to the other side of town where my mistress gladly spread her legs for me.

by urban pervert October 31, 2003

whip

What naughty girls are punished with.

She moaned with orgasmic glee when I slapped her ass with my whip.

by urban pervert March 26, 2003

ride

What a girl does when she sits on your dick.

Sally sat on his lap so she could experience the ride.

by urban pervert April 8, 2003

bumping tacos

An activity that lesbians do which is very fun to watch. Involves two females pressing their labias against each other and rocking back and forth to maximize their pleasure.

It was worth the $150 to watch two hot hookers bumping tacos while sucking my dick.

by urban pervert June 13, 2003

PMS

Pre-Menstrual Syndrome

The woman's "time of the month" when her uterus sheds its lining because her monthly egg isn't fertilized and dies.

The worst time to be around a woman, because she becomes an irrational psycho bitch which froths at the mouth with rage and seeks to destroy anything which stands in her way.

I'd rather be in Hell than to be around a womsn with PMS.

by urban pervert March 3, 2003

vaginal fluid

Fluid that flows like honey from a woman's vagina when she's horny.

Sarah's vaginal fluid tasted like fresh sardines.

by urban pervert June 9, 2003