Tissue Test

1) The process by which women rate "weepy" films. The more it makes them cry, be it through sadness, relief, happiness or just because someone had a cute face, the higher the film will rank.

2) The process by which men rate pornographic films. The more it makes them ejaculate, be it through domination, bondage, bukkake or just because someone had a cute ass, the higher the film will rank.
1) "Oh my God, you so have to watch Marley and Me, it's like a five on the tissue test!"

2) "Oh my God, you so have to watch Lesbian Fuckwhores, it's like a five on the tissue test!"
by MagickDio July 17, 2011
mugGet the Tissue Testmug.

gAy Team

What the A team should have been called. When do you ever see a buff black dude dripping in gold chains and showing his nipples at every available opportunity unless you're in a gay bar? Couple that with an awful lot of time spent in a van, going from town to town with a bunch of skinny white guys. One is mentally disturbed because he can't deal with the fact that he's gay, one is the token gay pretty boy and the other is a silver haired, cigar smoking bloke that can only be described as perfect pimp material. Add that to the fact that none of them fancy or make a move on the reporter and voila! You've got a very dodgy gaymobile trawling the country for fresh meat.
"The A team is composed entirely of gay circus freaks. It's the gAy Team"

"This definition of The A team will enrage certain individuals, but seriously- what do you think happens between weekly episodes, huh? Guys have needs and they clearly need man ass. They're the gAy Team. Ha!"
by MagickDio February 26, 2010
mugGet the gAy Teammug.

Fnorg

A striped, many legged demon that usually resides in a Christmas tree and judges all who pass it by. Capable of delivering a harsh mind blow to those who do not believe in it. Your safety depends on respect for the Fnorg.
"Don't walk past that tree unless you want the Fnorg to twat your thoughts"
by MagickDio February 06, 2010
mugGet the Fnorgmug.

McWedding

An extremely low budget affair that strives unsuccessfully to look classier than it is. Most do stop short of actually holding their wedding reception in MacDonalds, but if you've ever attended a reception similar to the one about to be described, rest assured, you have attended a "McWedding"

The bride and groom are both dressed in suits or in wedding clothes that were made around 25 years ago. The reception is held in a pub function room or community hall (not bad in itself) and is decorated with a few mismatched balloons, streamers, party poppers, paper tablecloths and weird papery swans and bells (very very bad). The food was clearly made by a team of aging female relatives with no concept of hygiene, and consists of rapidly drying tuna, ham and cheese sandwiches, copious amounts of cheese and pineapple on sticks, lots of quiche and breadsticks and platters of chicken nuggets. Confetti is all around every dish to make it look as if it's of higher quality. There is a DJ with about 3 lights and just as many CD's. There is no open bar. Children run about, fighting and crying because they're so bored. Adults run about, fighting and crying and drinking because they're so bored.
"I've still got food poisoning and a black eye from Pete and Sal's McWedding at the weekend. Shittest thing I've ever been to."
by MagickDio March 15, 2010
mugGet the McWeddingmug.

Salty Warning

What precum should be called. When giving a blowjob, and not wishing to swallow the jizz, take the slight increase in pre- ejaculate to be a salty warning. Not only does it stop you from coming across like a terrified amatuer, it also means the guy is less likely to hold your head and foil your escape.
"Did you spit after sucking off Craig? Cos jizz tastes like the sea, it's awful"

"Didn't need to. I just paid attention to the salty warning and let him spunk on my face"
by MagickDio March 07, 2010
mugGet the Salty Warningmug.

Salty Bargain

1) Snacks or otherwise salty goods that are purchased for a much lower price than they would ordinarily retail for.

2) Revenge that happened too quickly to be served cold, or taste sweet. It might have been done differently to how you wanted it, but it was still tasty and cost you much less time and effort than other methods. Salty bargain!!
1) Look at this half price gammon. Salty bargain!!

2) I was going to torture her for years with the idea that Imight tell her husband and eventually make her cave in and tell him herself. But then I just emailed him. Salty bargain.
by MagickDio September 22, 2011
mugGet the Salty Bargainmug.

Carkles

Those odd pinpricks of sparkling light that fill your vision before you pass out, and linger in your sights for at least 10 minutes after you've come round.
"Mate, I can't drink any more! I'm getting carkles!"

"I don't know if we can move him yet. Ask him if he still has carkles"
by MagickDio February 06, 2010
mugGet the Carklesmug.