magickdio's definitions
The week during which a woman has her period. There will be blood, an uncomfortable sense of tension and a bad tempered, unpredictable beast.
Take heed during shark week. If you show signs of weakness or aggression, you will be attacked. If you get attacked, it will be all your fault, infinitely more traumatic for her and you'll never be allowed to forget it.
Take heed during shark week. If you show signs of weakness or aggression, you will be attacked. If you get attacked, it will be all your fault, infinitely more traumatic for her and you'll never be allowed to forget it.
Man 1-"Why is your wife glaring at you from the window?"
Man 2-"Shark week. She's looking for an excuse to strike"
Man 1-"Pub?"
Man 2-"Hell yes."
Man 2-"Shark week. She's looking for an excuse to strike"
Man 1-"Pub?"
Man 2-"Hell yes."
by MagickDio January 9, 2011
Get the Shark Week mug.An extremely low budget affair that strives unsuccessfully to look classier than it is. Most do stop short of actually holding their wedding reception in MacDonalds, but if you've ever attended a reception similar to the one about to be described, rest assured, you have attended a "McWedding"
The bride and groom are both dressed in suits or in wedding clothes that were made around 25 years ago. The reception is held in a pub function room or community hall (not bad in itself) and is decorated with a few mismatched balloons, streamers, party poppers, paper tablecloths and weird papery swans and bells (very very bad). The food was clearly made by a team of aging female relatives with no concept of hygiene, and consists of rapidly drying tuna, ham and cheese sandwiches, copious amounts of cheese and pineapple on sticks, lots of quiche and breadsticks and platters of chicken nuggets. Confetti is all around every dish to make it look as if it's of higher quality. There is a DJ with about 3 lights and just as many CD's. There is no open bar. Children run about, fighting and crying because they're so bored. Adults run about, fighting and crying and drinking because they're so bored.
The bride and groom are both dressed in suits or in wedding clothes that were made around 25 years ago. The reception is held in a pub function room or community hall (not bad in itself) and is decorated with a few mismatched balloons, streamers, party poppers, paper tablecloths and weird papery swans and bells (very very bad). The food was clearly made by a team of aging female relatives with no concept of hygiene, and consists of rapidly drying tuna, ham and cheese sandwiches, copious amounts of cheese and pineapple on sticks, lots of quiche and breadsticks and platters of chicken nuggets. Confetti is all around every dish to make it look as if it's of higher quality. There is a DJ with about 3 lights and just as many CD's. There is no open bar. Children run about, fighting and crying because they're so bored. Adults run about, fighting and crying and drinking because they're so bored.
"I've still got food poisoning and a black eye from Pete and Sal's McWedding at the weekend. Shittest thing I've ever been to."
by MagickDio March 15, 2010
Get the McWedding mug.1) Snacks or otherwise salty goods that are purchased for a much lower price than they would ordinarily retail for.
2) Revenge that happened too quickly to be served cold, or taste sweet. It might have been done differently to how you wanted it, but it was still tasty and cost you much less time and effort than other methods. Salty bargain!!
2) Revenge that happened too quickly to be served cold, or taste sweet. It might have been done differently to how you wanted it, but it was still tasty and cost you much less time and effort than other methods. Salty bargain!!
1) Look at this half price gammon. Salty bargain!!
2) I was going to torture her for years with the idea that Imight tell her husband and eventually make her cave in and tell him herself. But then I just emailed him. Salty bargain.
2) I was going to torture her for years with the idea that Imight tell her husband and eventually make her cave in and tell him herself. But then I just emailed him. Salty bargain.
by MagickDio September 22, 2011
Get the Salty Bargain mug.Those odd pinpricks of sparkling light that fill your vision before you pass out, and linger in your sights for at least 10 minutes after you've come round.
"Mate, I can't drink any more! I'm getting carkles!"
"I don't know if we can move him yet. Ask him if he still has carkles"
"I don't know if we can move him yet. Ask him if he still has carkles"
by MagickDio February 6, 2010
Get the Carkles mug.1) Putting a large amount of effort into doing something badly. More often than not, unintentionally. People that are doing the fuck jobs rarely see their utter abortions as anything except works of art.
2) When you injure yourself spectacularly in an incredibly stupid fashion.
2) When you injure yourself spectacularly in an incredibly stupid fashion.
1) The men watched, transfixed. Even after their handy hints, Sheila continued fuckjobbing the Creosote and gazing appreciatively at the terrible mess.
2) Sorry I didn't text you back. It was due to me fuckjobbing my finger by poking the blades on my blender when it was plugged in.
2) Sorry I didn't text you back. It was due to me fuckjobbing my finger by poking the blades on my blender when it was plugged in.
by MagickDio July 6, 2011
Get the Fuckjobbing mug.1) the jacking of a very small penis. To wank a winkle is to perform a wankle
2) The young son of a wanker or chavs who is already displaying wanker like tendencies, ie; swearing at you in the street, calling you "guv" and swigging endless cans of cheap liquid bought in bulk at the local Spar
2) The young son of a wanker or chavs who is already displaying wanker like tendencies, ie; swearing at you in the street, calling you "guv" and swigging endless cans of cheap liquid bought in bulk at the local Spar
1) "Mum, Sam's locked himself in the bathroom again!"
"Ah, leave him at it love, he's just having a wankle"
~"His dick was so tiny, I realised I was actually giving him a wankle"
2) "You know that twat down the road? Well, his lad dropped a crushed can of 'Kola' in my garden and then told me to "Chill the fuck out, Guv" when I told him to pick it up!"
"Jesus, what a wankle"
"Ah, leave him at it love, he's just having a wankle"
~"His dick was so tiny, I realised I was actually giving him a wankle"
2) "You know that twat down the road? Well, his lad dropped a crushed can of 'Kola' in my garden and then told me to "Chill the fuck out, Guv" when I told him to pick it up!"
"Jesus, what a wankle"
by MagickDio February 4, 2010
Get the Wankle mug.The main objective on a guys night out. To wrangle is to round up. A Ho is a loose woman.
A ho wrangler is a guy with massive easy girl pulling potential, who rarely ever spends a night alone, or with the same person more than twice.
A night of ho wrangling consists of bankrupting yourselves by buying numerous shots for women who are waiting at the bar, hoping that one might want to shag you. You will also dance in a grinding motion behind several women, in an attempt to wrangle them.
A ho wrangler is a guy with massive easy girl pulling potential, who rarely ever spends a night alone, or with the same person more than twice.
A night of ho wrangling consists of bankrupting yourselves by buying numerous shots for women who are waiting at the bar, hoping that one might want to shag you. You will also dance in a grinding motion behind several women, in an attempt to wrangle them.
by MagickDio August 20, 2010
Get the Ho Wrangling mug.