flatster's definitions

war face

Wide-eyed, adrenalin-filled psycho grimace on one's face as you charge in to battle/a fight/game of chicken. Exemplified by "Full Metal Jacket".

HARTMAN
Let me see your war face!

JOKER
Sir?

HARTMAN
You've got a war face? Aaaaaaaagh! That's a war face. Now let me see your war face!

JOKER
Aaaaaaaagh!

HARTMAN
Bullshit! You didn't convince me! Let me see your real war face!

JOKER
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagh!

HARTMAN
You didn't scare me! Work on it!

by Flatster May 18, 2006

bomb

A method by which one hit's water from a great height, usually at a swimming pool suitably equipped with a 5 metre (or greater) diving board.

Method:

Ascend the dizzying heights of the highest board you find at your local - on indeed, not local - swimming baths. Await the passing-by on the pool side of a life-guard/pregnant woman/hot totty/poof and then leap, feet first into mid air. Pull your knees to your chest and hit the water, arse first, angling slightly to ensure the greatest tsanami-like splash covers abovementioned recipient from head to toe in chlorine rich H2O.

Best accomplished by extremely overweight males who think it all a complete hoot.

Await expletive and expulsion from said swimming baths.

Diver 1: "Look! There's that gayboy lifeguard! Bomb him!"

***leap***

Diver 2: "YAAAAaaaaaaa!!!!"

***Kasplashyboom***

Lifeguard: "Leave the pool now you wittle wapthcallion you!"

by Flatster December 28, 2005

fact

The distance between the anus and the vagina.

Example: hold up your left hand and make a "C" shape with your thumb and index finger.

That's the distance you're looking for.

A FACT: The distance between a fuck hole and a muck hole and if you miss yer inna shit 'n thassa FACT.

by flatster December 28, 2005

happy slappy

Criminal acts, often caught on mobile video phone's and passed around to other children to witness. Often these are scenes of bullying, rape, and, in some cases murder.

Newspaper headline: "Happy slappy incident: gang of 19, average age 12, gang rape girl, 13".

by Flatster November 26, 2005

pea soup

Extremely thick smog, characterised by early black-and-white films set in between-the-war-and-just-after settings.

Cue: really bad cockney accent...

Cockney chap: Cor blimey, guv! I carn eevin see me face in this!
Cheeky chappy: Nah! S' a right pea souper n' no mistake!

by Flatster November 18, 2005

bollocks on a bulldog

Something that stands out and is very visible. The bulldog's testiclar region is extremely prominant and hence the reference.

Bloke 1: "Fuck me sideways! She's had a tit job!"
Bloke 2: "Like bollocks on a bulldog mate!"

by flatster November 12, 2005

jelly jewelry

The creation of jewelry consisting of semen.

Rings: during hand-shandy's
Necklace's: when she doesn't swallow
Bracelets: when she gives you a hand-shandy

She was tugging hard the other night and I shot me load, giving her some nice rings and plenty of other jelly jewelry as well...

by Flatster November 10, 2005