alan's definitions

spum

unwanted cum, in a similar vein as unwanted email is defined as spam, unwanted cum is defined as spum.

before i could move he spum on my face.

by alan April 5, 2004

Money

A paper or coins use to deceive the mind; the leading cause of death and crimes, the only way a dork can get laid

Bill Gates got laid because the girl got paid

by Alan October 8, 2004

Pirate Slap

A pirate slap is a slap in which the knuckles are tightened and slightly curled, then powerfully swinging your arm outward and backhanding someone. Commonly used in a downward thrust to show that one is superior to another.

PETA Member: HEY MAN WHY DO YOU EAT MEAT!!!!
Pirate: Arr, cause it's good bitch! *Pirate Slap*
PETA Member: ='(

by Alan October 15, 2004

jaunbrand

someone who takes your porn, watches it, rips you off for being into a 'sub-genre of a sub-genre', then gives the porn to fano, and it's never to be seen again.

where's the porn?
dunno, i think jaunbrand has it.
you sure? i thought fano had it.
no, jaunbrand has it.
oh.

by alan May 4, 2004

Mudhut

A short fat woman.

Ann Widecombe, a uk M.P

by Alan December 19, 2003

LPC

Leather Personnel Carrier: footwear. Combat boots, boots in general, shoes, sandals, etc.

Based on the military's fascination with obscure nomenclatures (their name for "name") for ordinary objects, and for acronyms.

Sergeant: "Awraight, maggit, do you think you can operate those LPC's and go fill these five-gallon cans from the water buffalo two miles up the road without hurting anybody?"

by Alan July 27, 2004

zuma-dollars

an interest-free loan that you don't have to pay back. ever.

i wish all banks worked with zuma-dollars!
yeah. fnb sucks!

by alan October 21, 2004