William Stephens's definitions

superman

A technique of drunk urinating which involves using no hands and an adequete amount of precision. It is the leading cause of yellow shoes and slippery bathroom floors. Oh, and don't forget that gay guy that wears tights and has an S on his shirt.

I killed my grandma due to negligent supermanning.

by William Stephens May 3, 2006

burt reynolds

The answer to every question on Playstation 2's Jeopardy!. Actually, since you need to answer in the form of a question, every answer is: "Who is Burt Reynolds."

Alex Trebek: "The Capital of South Korea."
Jeopardy! Contestant: "Who is Burt Reynolds?"

by William Stephens May 3, 2006

nursing home

A place where there are no toilets, becuase everyone craps in their pants. Also, one of the funniest places to set off a fire alarm.

Grandson: "Dad, what's that smell."
Father: "I think grandpa crapped in his pants again."
Grandson: "Let's send him to a nursing home."
Grandpa: "I'm old."

by William Stephens May 22, 2006

stairs

Wheelchair kryptonite.

Person: "Hey, let's go down these stairs."
Wheelchair Person: "NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

by William Stephens May 22, 2006

Myspace Tom

A big computer nerd, who grew up with no friends. He created a network of people, in which he is automatically added as everyone's friend. This makes Tom think that he has actual friends (he doesn't) and he can now sleep and masturbate without crying.

Person 1: "Hey, I just joined MySpace and this Tom guy is apparently my friend. I don't know him and he doesn't look like the type of person that I would normally befriend."
Person 2: "Myspace Tom is a computer nerd and made it so the MySpace network automatically makes him your friend. I suggest that you immediately delete that pathetic loser from your friends."

by William Stephens May 22, 2006

suspenders

An excuse that nerds have been using for years to explain why they are unable to obtain pleasureful blowjobs.

Nerd: "Dude, I totally would have gotten a blowjob, but it would have been too much trouble to remove my suspenders in order to drop my khakis to my penny loafers, exposing my penis and testicles."
Other: "Why did'nt you just pull it out of your fly?"
Nerd: "Suspenders, chess, Dungeons and Dragons, Harry Potter, pocket protector, compuuuuter........." (hangs himself)

by William Stephens May 3, 2006

P.S.

1. What part of the alphabet would look like if Q and R were elminated.

2. Two letters that are usually followed by the phrase "I hope you die and burn in hell."

Dear Grandma,

Thank you for the wonderful cookies.
P.S. I hope you die and burn in hell.

by William Stephens May 3, 2006