No chance I'm gonna give a definition.. What if someone's watching? :o

/me dons ninja mask
I must be paranoid, I keep looking over my back for th.. AAAAHHHH!!!!!!
by EmSixTeen August 7, 2004
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Believing that everyone is out to get you.
Although it is true that everyone IS out to get you, such as the government and stalkers.
by AYB April 1, 2003
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Pretending to wash your hands when nobody else is even in the men's room.
by auaiomrn April 1, 2003
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A disease that afflicts me and made me think for 3 years of my life that my left leg was longer than my right leg. Every time my phone rings I think it is the FBI. And every time my doorbell rings I think it is a giant purple dinosaurs that eats children.
Person: "William, why are you in the fetal position under your bed?"
Me: "Paranoia."
by William Stephens May 14, 2006
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baseless or excessive suspicion of the motives of others.
people with paranoia are uselessly suspicious of others
by WEHATEYOUFUCKOFF September 2, 2008
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When you do something naughty about 1-7 meters away from a teacher, depending on the circumstance, and you have no idea if they saw/heard you. It’s like paranoid schizophrenia on crack. You want to turn around and see if they saw. But you can’t. You're just stuck there, frozen. Your mates are telling you "sir is behind you!" and you’re just thinking about the punishment from this. You think about all your life choices leading up to this very situation. Then your heart sinks and you feel butterflies. Nearly fainting, you awkwardly, anonymously walk away slowly. He didn’t see you. You know he didn’t. But we do this anyway.
Jamal: fuck

Jimmy: bro miss yeet is behind you

Jamal: *extreme paranoia*

Jimmy: bro he's a gonner. Hes got paranoia. No coming from that now.

Can we get an F in the chat for Jamal there.
by i out pizza'd the hut November 4, 2020
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Paranoia is realising that humanity is eating itself and you are just the starter.
All those fat cats licking their lips...
by paranoid writer July 29, 2004
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