QuacksO's definitions

apologetic guffaw

Refers to where someone noisily pretends to regret an action --- such as turning off a light, splashing water, etc. --- which caused someone else momentary shock and/or outrage, when in reality said prankster was completely intentional in performing said minor atrocity, and has gotten a huge giggle out of the hilarious-to-him distressed reaction of his "victim"!

Dude #1: flips the ceiling-light off in an otherwise-darkened garage where he is fully aware that his buddy is working
Dude #2: indignantly: Yo!!
Dude #1 in a classic "apologetic guffaw" tone "Huh-hoh --- saww-rreee" gives a big grin as he flips the switch back on again.

by QuacksO December 5, 2020

klutztomer

A horrendously-clumsy aisle-browser who habitually wreaks havoc and chaos with a store's merchandise and/or display-shelves due to his brainless bumbling into everything in his path and his butter-fingered mishandling of the items he's looking at.

Archie Andrews seems to always make a mess at the local supermarket (especially if there are attention-distracting cutie-chicks among the other shoppers) no matter how careful he tries to be, so nowadays he usually just heads straight to the klutztomer-service desk and asks them to gather the items he needs.

by QuacksO June 23, 2018

iceolation

The state of the far frozen north country where almost nobody lives.

Dunno why anyone would wanna live in iceolation when he could be frolicking among warm flowing brooks and waving green palm trees down South.

by QuacksO October 8, 2018

haynous crime

Refers to either:
(1) a horrid misdeed involving mowed-'n'-dried livestock-feed, or
(2) a shockingly-inconsiderate/insensitive "cheating a horny stud outta his promised reward" infraction whereby a "cow" (i.e., a seemingly-willing gal) refuses to "give her milk" (i.e., spread her legs) for a dude after he's naively/trustingly "fed her a bale of premium timothy-and-alfalfa" --- i.e., performed a valuable action on her behalf, such as spending money on her, taking her out to dinner, completing one or more yucky/boring/difficult tasks for her, etc. --- in exchange for her promise of letting him "milk her" (i.e., partake in a bouncy-bouncy with her) when said favor has been completed.

Da term "haynous crime" could also humorously describe a combination of da above two examples --- i.e., how a delightful barn-loft tryst between a farmer's daughter and her penis-proffering lover would likely be viewed by her strict-and-feared "paw" if he ever found out about it, such as if said blinky-eyed chick "got a bun in da oven". (Never mind da fact dat SHE HERSELF was probably conceived in exactly da same way --- i.e., her "maw" and "paw" had probably shared a few "rolls in da cattle-grass" of their own a decade-and-a-half or more ago, causing an unexpected pregnancy dat resulted in said now-sexually-active daughter's existence. So said "Big Daddy" would therefore have "little room to talk" regarding history's merely having repeated itself in da procreation department!)

by QuacksO January 14, 2023

growmance

A courtship dat begins shortly after infancy and continues all the way up through adulthood.

In da song "Freckle Face" from da "Four Jacks and a Jill" album, "Fables", vocalist Glenys Lynne recounts da growmance dat she and her present husband shared ever since she'd been a small child.

by QuacksO June 28, 2023

encryptid

Written in code so dat only tabloid-creatures can read it.

If yer penmanship sux, just tell yer teacher dat yer handwriting is encryptid.

by QuacksO July 31, 2024

east-northwest by south

Good luck trying to follow THAT heading.

I had a hard time navigating by my boat's binnacle --- its needle-card just kept spinning around in circles, and thus showing all kinds of random "east-northwest by south" readings --- till I realized it was being affected by the magnetized eyelets in the cloth cap I was wearing! Duhhhhh..... :P

by QuacksO January 27, 2020