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Lex Sleuthor's definitions

Cell potato

A person too lazy to get off their ass and go see colleagues in the same office or building, who contacts them instead by cellphone.
At the watercooler....

Jon: Hey Sally, how's things?
Sally: Not bad. Got any weekend plans?
Jon: Well, I was thinking (phone vibrates) sorry, gotta check this. Hello? (looks around, sighs) I'll get one.
Sally: Who was that?
Jon: Bob. He wanted a cup of water.
Sally: But he is sitting right over there! What a cell potato...
Jon: What's a 'cell potato?'
Sally: Ever heard of Urban Dictionary?
by Lex Sleuthor April 26, 2010
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karaoke masochism

Deliberately choosing songs to sing at karaoke for which you have neither the voice range or tone, and taking a perverse pleasure as you struggle painfully through it.

Antonym - karaoke sadism
Gina: I don't know why Lisa keeps choosing those high pitched songs. She doesn't have the voice for it at all.

Tom: Maybe she's into karaoke masochism.
by Lex Sleuthor May 29, 2009
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karaoke sadist

A singing-talentless person who deliberately chooses songs at karaoke that are painful to listen to and who uses their power or authority to inflict their singing on others.
John: Man, President Watanabe's singing is terrible! Why does he always take us to karaoke? And he's the boss so I can never say no...

Yumiko: That guy is a pure karaoke sadist!
by Lex Sleuthor May 29, 2009
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shamonella

Pretending that you have food poisoning to get out of work or onerous duties.
Brad: Why didn't John get up to come fishing with us this morning?

Brenda: Dude said his stomach hurt, that maybe he had some bad tuna yesterday.

Brad: Sounds like a case of shamonella to me.
by Lex Sleuthor May 29, 2009
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fagnet

A guy who attracts homosexual guys like a magnet. Usually the fagnet is not gay himself.
Sally: Hey Tim, wanna go to the gay bar with us? They always have better music there.

Tim: Love to, but I'm a real fagnet. I always get molested when I'm there. Think I'll pass, but have a great time.
by Lex Sleuthor June 6, 2009
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Hormonal Chernobyl

When PMS reaches a critical fission point resulting in a total emotional meltdown of the PMSer and a poisoning of their surroundings so bad that any cohabitators must immediately flee the scene.
Chris: Hey Tom, could you let me in to the office? I left my keycard home.
Tom: That's not like you. What happened?
Chris: Oh the wife went hormonal chernobyl this morning and I skedaddled without cellphone, card, and lunch.
Tom: That's tough man. Spot you for lunch?
Chris: Dude, much appreciated.
Tom: Bros before hos man.
by Lex Sleuthor December 6, 2009
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scummy mummy

Derivative of yummy mummy. A hot-looking mother who dresses overly sexy or downright trashy.
Joe: Ooh, check out that skank! Must be coming back from her nightjob at the blowjob bar.

Bill: Nah man, that scummy mummy is picking up her kids at the preschool. Guess she's passing on the trashon sense.
by Lex Sleuthor April 23, 2009
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