51 definitions by HMB

Shorthand for "Hitler's moustache". This describes a woman's pubic hair when she has shaved almost all of it off, leaving only a thin strip of hair covering her vulva.

So named for its similarity to Adolf Hitler's moustache, which was threefold:

a) It was also narrow and dark.
b) It also "lay above the lips".
c) It can move hypnotically, with a strange effect on the weak-minded.
I asked my first girlfriend if she would shave her beaver, and it turns out she was a member of PETA so I ended up getting slapped.

Then I asked my second girlfriend if she would shave her Map of Tasmania, and it turns out she was an Australian Aborigine so she cut me with a flint-knapped knife.

Last night I asked my third girlfriend to shave her Hitler tash, and she looked at me and said "I'm Jewish".

If the Mossad come looking for me, I'm not at home, okay?
by HMB May 23, 2007
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1. Verb - to press up against or to jostle.
2. Noun - the end part of a rifle or shotgun or machinegun that rests against the shoulder or pectoral muscles to increase stability during firing.
3. Noun - the part of a human being that knows wind and earth. The buttocks and anus of a person.
4. Noun - the recipient or target of a joke.
Ever since Father O'Malley was caught butting that butt into that young choirboy's butt, he has become the butt of many cruel jokes.
by HMB April 11, 2003
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1. (noun, botanical) A growth process whereby a plant sheath or stem segment grows back on itself, essentially turning itself inside out.

2. (noun, CIA/FBI/NSA) An interrogation process whereby a suspect is bent back on himself or herself, essentially turning them inside out.

3. (noun) An intercourse process whereby a body part or prop (e.g., vibrator, cell phone, TV remote, etc) is placed into the vagina.

4. (cartographical) On Olde Worlde Mappes by Iohn Speede, c. 1626, this term meant "having taken one's leave to abscond to Amazonia". Literally "within a country of vaginas".
1. David Attenborough: "But once the fly trap is fed a piece of meat, time-lapse photography demonstrates a dramatic change in growth. By the third invagination, the Venus fly trap has already offered up two new leaves."

2. John Ashcroft: "But once the Eye-rackie is tied to the rack, time-lapse photography demonstrates a dramatic change in growth. By the third invagination, the Taliban suspect has already offered up three new accomplices. Even better, by the fourth invagination, he was no longer able to speak or make any noise at all. A good day's work for the NSA."

3. HMB: "Dude, your aunt is really starting to freak me out. Last time we made out, she suggested invagination, and I agreed. But she made me wrap a brick in cellophane and stick it up her pussy. You don't pay me enough for this sort of crap. I'm going back to Taco Bell."

4. When the American troops arrived in Hanoi to reinforce the ARVN troops there, they quickly learned the skills to stay alive, including camouflage, mine detection, and most importantly, avoiding the major fighting from the vantage point of an observatory invagination - often in groups.
by HMB February 8, 2004
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A play on the term decepticon. In the prostitution industry, "transformer" means transvestite/transsexual, and "decepticon" means any very convincing transvestite/transsexual.

An "e-cepticon" is an online version, especially a female buddy or penpal whom you have known for many years, and who turns out (despite all evidence to tbe contrary) to actually be male.
HMB: I've been using this female username on this public game-related bulletin board for five years now, and people are pretty convinced I'm a woman, especially because I update the avatar occasionally with an female friend's picture. But, it's getting harder and harder to talk her into posing for avatar pics these days. I may just have to drop the whole charade and admit she was an e-cepticon.
by HMB April 29, 2005
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(noun) From Ancient Greek dramatic tradition, this usually comes after a great revelation (anagnorisis) has occurred, and consists of a reversal of fortunes. Thus, a king who rules wisely for fifty years, then discovers that he killed his father and married his mother without knowing it, is at that point in time a participant in a peripetaeia.
Film Critic 1: "I was relaxing with a few porn vids the other night and it turns out one of them was a gay porn tape that I'd shoplifted by mistake. Well, guess who was starring in that gay tape?"

Film Critic 2: "Dude, I don't know. I don't watch gay porn."

Film Critic 1: "Me neither, but get this: it was Peter North."

Film Critic 2: "No way!"

Film Critic 1: "I swear, it was Peter North. And another guy was doing him up the butt and then he comes all over the schoolroom table."

Film Critic 2: "Well this certainly makes for a very dramatic peripetaeia, coming as it does hot on the heels of an anagnorisis."

Film Critic 1: "Yes, and we might even say that his latent homosexuality is his hamartia."
by HMB November 20, 2003
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1. An adjudicating person or body that is spuriously invoked in order to win an argument or discussion, especially where no such body actually exists.

2. An air of supreme knowledgeability and pretentiosity, projected by a person who will speak at length and with great opinion, on topics of which he or she actually has only a passing grasp at best.
(In this example, both HMB and DrB are using fauxthoritative arguments, and both are displaying fauxthority.)

HMB: Sylvia Saint's finest asset is her bottom.
DrB: You lie. It's her breasts.
HMB: Surely not. For breasts, q.v. Brianna Banks, Asia Carrera, et al. Theirs are much larger.
DrB: Your argument hinges on the theory that quantity is preferable to quality. In defence of the alternative view, Sylvia Saint is entirely natural, as can be deduced when viewing her in the reclining attitude.
HMB: Be that as it may, her breasts are much smaller, at most 0.94 British Standard Handfuls. By comparison, Asia Carrera weighs in at a hefty 2.09 BSH.
DrB: Yes, but is it not spoken in the Book of Erogenis that "Reckon thee the food in thy bowl the same as thou wouldst reckon the tits on thy concubines: that any more than a mouthful will be wasted?"

(Discussion continues as both speakers get to indulge their vanities in this verbal equivalent of public masturbation.)
by HMB August 20, 2006
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(Adj.) Something that is pretty bad but which will suffice because nothing better can be found.
1. When you're on your lunchbreak in downtown Washington D.C., McDonald's is a perfectly satiscraptory place to eat.

2. I am living in an area where the cable company has a monopoly. Prices are high, and the service is only barely satiscraptory. I have to leave Missouri.

3. I don't have much love for the AK-47 assault rifle, but until I have saved up enough money to buy a TIE Advanced starfighter with quadmounted lasers and deflection shield system, it will be satiscraptory.
by HMB August 13, 2004
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