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HMB's definitions

kickpebble

A term to denote mild disappointment, embarrassment, or even just simple boredom in a text environment.

Taken from children's cartoons, where a character down on his luck or with nothing better to do might sigh and kick a pebble down the street.
AC: So how'd your date with the girl from Beijing go?

HMB: It was okay. She's really nice, and we went around and saw some cool places in the city. But she lives pretty far away so...

AC: Yeah, long distance relationships could be tough.

HMB: Yep.

AC:

HMB:

AC:

HMB (breaking the silence): *kickpebble*
by HMB August 8, 2009
mugGet the kickpebblemug.

osimosity

(Noun) The state or condition of being awesome. Defined in a bogus mathematical theorem as:

Quality + Perception
-------------------- = Osimosity
Vulgar popularity

Not to be confused with animosity, or pretentiosity.
1. Lord Ossum of the Ossumites was an Ozymandian well known for his osimosity.

2.
Freddie:
I'm just a poor boy, nobody loves me...

Chorus:
HE'S-JUST-A-POOR-BOY/
NAMED-FREDDIE-MERCURY/
BOW-GASP-AND-QUAIL/
AT-HIS-OSIMOSITY!
by HMB August 2, 2004
mugGet the osimositymug.

NMD

1. National Missile Defence. A controversial plan to set up a series of interceptor systems to destroy incoming nuclear warheads and render an entire nation safe from missile attack.

2. A virulent curse in Mandarin Chinese, as coined by late Qing Dynasty and early Republic of China writer Lü Xun, who defined the "national curseword" of the Chinese people as "ni ma de", or literally "your mother's ...". Lü Xun never specified what possession or part of the mother is meant, but one can presume it is obscene.

Compare this with TMD and WMD.
1. President Bush: "We intend to ignore Chinese governmental protests, and to go ahead with plans to install a working NMD."

2. President Jiang Zemin: "Well, in that case all I have to say is 'NMD'. And now I'm going to play the piano."
by HMB March 12, 2004
mugGet the NMDmug.

churn rate

1. The rate at which new employees vacate a given job or company, based on dissatisfaction with bad work conditions.

2. The rate at which a person's previous meal vacates his or her stomach, based on the intensity of their vomitting.

3. The rate at which a man's semen vacates his testicles, prostate, and Cowper's glands, based on the intensity of masturbation.
All: Yale's MBA program postulates the "Churn Rate Paradigm" as:

Client's churn rate = k(worker's stomach churn rate) = k(new worker's churn rate)

The intervariable relation is proportional and geometric.

1. The new-employee churn rate at my previous job was really high.

2. The work itself was nauseating. I would vomit at least twice a day. On high traffic days, employee stomach churn rate was even higher.

3. It was a mopping job at a sperm bank/peep show/gay brothel (delete as appropriate). For some reason, I always ended up with the highest clientele churn rate. I hated that job. I'm going back to Taco Bell.
by HMB February 10, 2004
mugGet the churn ratemug.

rolling the mouse wheel

Masturbating a woman or girl to orgasm. This takes its name from the "flicking" motion of the middle finger when you are using a wheelmouse and trying to scroll down through a lot of text. In masturbation the action is almost exactly the same, except that the mouse wheel is replaced by your lucky lady's clit.

Also, I've noticed that the sound produced is completely different.

A similar computer/sex term is "double clicking on the mouse" which also means female masturbation.
HMB (who is male): So, AC, what did you do all day today?

AC (who is female): You would not believe. I found a kick-ass .zip of photochopped fake Johnny Depp porn. It was a really big file, too. I had to spend almost two hours rolling the mouse wheel just to get through it.

HMB: Dear me. Airing the orchid?

AC: You bet. I got my daily musical practice of playing the upside down piano.

HMB: Feeding oats to the pony?

AC: Tickling the toothless gibbon.

HMB: Typing in the gussets.

AC: Paddling the pink canoe until it leaks.

HMB: Finger painting the ham sandwich.

AC: Stirring the mixing bowl.

HMB: Petting the cat.

AC: Fingering the bald suspect.

HMB: ... So, um, can I borrow that .zip file? ... For, erm, personal reasons...

AC: !
by HMB December 9, 2006
mugGet the rolling the mouse wheelmug.

erse

1. Old English term for the word "arse" (which means "ass").
2. Present day term for the Irish tongue.
1. and 2.

"Irish people talk a load of erse."
by HMB April 6, 2003
mugGet the ersemug.

blue ball

1. A ball that is blue.
2. A testicle or testicles that are blue.
3. A testicle or testicles that have not been used for a long time and therefore, in male mythological perception, are blue in color. This is merely metaphorical as the only way that testicles can turn blue are A) through the application of ink or paint, as in the scrotal tattooes of the old wrinkled retainers of the WangaWonkee tribes of the lower Balkans, or B) through constriction, as in preparation for castration (to prevent urination, which may infect the wound before it heals adequately).
My girlfriend wouldn:t screw me/do me/tattoo me so I went to bed with blue balls.
by HMB April 27, 2003
mugGet the blue ballmug.

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