HMB's definitions
"Have you seen that Kate Moss. She's got tits like fried eggs but I'd certainly slip her one."
Mario: "How many marks would you give Princess Peach, out of two?"
Luigi: "Hmm. I'd give her one."
Mario: "How many marks would you give Princess Peach, out of two?"
Luigi: "Hmm. I'd give her one."
by HMB July 12, 2003
Get the One mug.An Indonesian (and probably Malay, too) word. This describes the behavior of women when they see a cute baby. It also describes the baby itself. Translated into English, it means roughly:
"The state of going out of one's mind in adoration of something that is extremely likeable or cute."
A woman under the influence of Gemes will hug and fondle the baby for very long periods of time, oblivious to all other disractions. (Including but not limited to: a boyfriend's inquiries, the train leaving the station, or the arrival of winter.)
Oftentimes, the bout of Gemes can be so severe that the baby will start crying, which only serves to intensify the attention paid to it in a vicious cycle of female hormonal reactions.
"The state of going out of one's mind in adoration of something that is extremely likeable or cute."
A woman under the influence of Gemes will hug and fondle the baby for very long periods of time, oblivious to all other disractions. (Including but not limited to: a boyfriend's inquiries, the train leaving the station, or the arrival of winter.)
Oftentimes, the bout of Gemes can be so severe that the baby will start crying, which only serves to intensify the attention paid to it in a vicious cycle of female hormonal reactions.
A group of Indonesian women: Aw! Look at the baby! GEMES!
A group of Indonesian boyfriends: WTF.
Used as an adjective: The baby was very gemes.
Used as a verb: The baby was gemesed.
Used as a verb: The women became gemesed over a single baby, who was itself gemes.
A group of Indonesian boyfriends: WTF.
Used as an adjective: The baby was very gemes.
Used as a verb: The baby was gemesed.
Used as a verb: The women became gemesed over a single baby, who was itself gemes.
by HMB August 13, 2004
Get the gemes mug.1. Verb - to press up against or to jostle.
2. Noun - the end part of a rifle or shotgun or machinegun that rests against the shoulder or pectoral muscles to increase stability during firing.
3. Noun - the part of a human being that knows wind and earth. The buttocks and anus of a person.
4. Noun - the recipient or target of a joke.
2. Noun - the end part of a rifle or shotgun or machinegun that rests against the shoulder or pectoral muscles to increase stability during firing.
3. Noun - the part of a human being that knows wind and earth. The buttocks and anus of a person.
4. Noun - the recipient or target of a joke.
Ever since Father O'Malley was caught butting that butt into that young choirboy's butt, he has become the butt of many cruel jokes.
by HMB April 11, 2003
Get the Butt mug.In text-only conversations, such as email, IM, or status updates, this word means "looks proud" or "looks smug".
It can often be intended ironically, especially when somebody has done something dubious or unhygienic but still feels the need to tell others about it.
It can often be intended ironically, especially when somebody has done something dubious or unhygienic but still feels the need to tell others about it.
Conversation 1 (straight usage):
HMB: Hey, I got sworn in at the high court this week as a lawyer! Woo hoo!
DTM: Oh wow! Respect! I'd imagine you're over the moon about this!
HMB: Yes. Yes, I am. *prouds*
Conversation 2 (ironic usage):
HMB: I breathed on a kitten once, and it got real sick. *prouds*
DTM: Dude, WTF.
HMB: Hey, I got sworn in at the high court this week as a lawyer! Woo hoo!
DTM: Oh wow! Respect! I'd imagine you're over the moon about this!
HMB: Yes. Yes, I am. *prouds*
Conversation 2 (ironic usage):
HMB: I breathed on a kitten once, and it got real sick. *prouds*
DTM: Dude, WTF.
by HMB December 21, 2009
Get the prouds mug.A handpalm is a scenario where a normally-competitive situation has become so unbalanced that one side dominates all of the others and exercises an overwhelming degree of control. It metaphorically refers to the dominant player holding all the rest of the players "in the palm of the hand", meaning it can crush them and end the contest at any point. At this point, any actual competition purely symbolic - the contest continues solely at the desire of the dominant player.
A situation like this can arise in a simple game such as checkers or chess, or it can apply to more complex scenarios like economic competition, academic mastery of a given field, or military might.
Note that merely being the strongest player is not enough for a handpalm scenario. The scenario must become so lopsided that no action by any of the opposing elements can possibly break the victor's dominant position, short of intentional self-handicap or monumentally inept play.
A situation like this can arise in a simple game such as checkers or chess, or it can apply to more complex scenarios like economic competition, academic mastery of a given field, or military might.
Note that merely being the strongest player is not enough for a handpalm scenario. The scenario must become so lopsided that no action by any of the opposing elements can possibly break the victor's dominant position, short of intentional self-handicap or monumentally inept play.
Ex 1:
HMB: "I played chess against my girlfriend last night. It was brutal. She started with a handicap of one Bishop, one Knight, and one Rook and she STILL managed to corner me with two Queens and a Rook. She then spent ten moves of her stalemate count just taunting me with them to make her point."
HDT: "Wow. I've never seen a handpalm of that magnitude. Rusty?"
HMB: "You're telling me. I played a game of chess against myself the other day and somehow managed to lose."
Ex 2:
HMB: "My girlfriend inflicted the most intense handpalm last night. I'm still staggering from the blow."
DTM (who doesn't understand the term): "NIIICE! High five?"
HMB: "...no. No, I think not..."
HMB: "I played chess against my girlfriend last night. It was brutal. She started with a handicap of one Bishop, one Knight, and one Rook and she STILL managed to corner me with two Queens and a Rook. She then spent ten moves of her stalemate count just taunting me with them to make her point."
HDT: "Wow. I've never seen a handpalm of that magnitude. Rusty?"
HMB: "You're telling me. I played a game of chess against myself the other day and somehow managed to lose."
Ex 2:
HMB: "My girlfriend inflicted the most intense handpalm last night. I'm still staggering from the blow."
DTM (who doesn't understand the term): "NIIICE! High five?"
HMB: "...no. No, I think not..."
by HMB February 6, 2010
Get the handpalm mug.Similar to satiscraptory, this term denotes anything of below average quality for masturbation, put to use because there's nothing better around.
1. I was searching for some pictures the other day in order to host a wrestling match between the Pink Darth Vader and Hand Solo. I coulnd't find any Carrie Fisher pictures, only Jamie Lee Curtis. But I photochopped them into a white dress and headphone hair, and it was satisfaptory.
by HMB August 13, 2004
Get the satisfaptory mug.This describes the phenomenon that people sitting in a plane will get smellier and more repulwsive than people doing a similar amount of sitting at home or at work. Regardless of how short or long your flight is, merely being seated in an airplane means your ass will stink, for several reasons.
Firstly the air pressure differential after take off means that air pockets of intestinal gas will be higher pressure and more likely to force themselves out of your chocolate barking spider.
Secondly, consider the smell of every other traveller that has sat in the same seat, warming the same cushion with the same intestinal gases and sweat, and dealing with the everpresent background noise and stress of air travel, while a crappy movie plays on a screen too small to see and which is blocked anyway by other passengers getting up, sitting down, or just hanging like douchebag fuckwits in the aisle talking to their colleagues because they think that air travel is FUN.
Meanwhile the stewardesses are busy standing in the rear gantry leaning against the snack boxes (which now cost $5 extra each just to buy) with their legs open and their panties around one ankle getting shagged from behind by the stewards, and the pilots are busy smoking weed as the airport handlers break the locks on your luggage down below to steal your souvenirs and computers, under broad security rights bestowed by the TSA federal agency while the lone fat greasy headed steward who can't get any female flight attendant to part her Pink Sea for him is taking out his frustrations by forcing people to move out of Economy-Plus seating (which costs you $75 more at the check-in counter than regular Economy for an extra 5 cm. of legroom) regardless of the fact that once the plane takes off the people will just fucking move back in because airport security can't board a moving plane, fuckwits.
This combination of low air pressure, substandard treatment, and superstandard psychological pressure results in larger than usual pockets of intestinal gas forcing themselves out of your anus and warming the fabric around your fundament.
This also means that ANY TIME A PASSENGER GETS OUT OF THEIR SEAT, their ass comes up to the same level as the seated passengers' faces. This is especially notable when the first over-caffeinated passenger jumps out of his seat at the end of a flight to grab his carry on luggage so he can be the first to wait in a completely stationary line to disembark, and you're still seated, and his ass wafts a foul stench your way that makes your eyes water.
Possibly a contributing factor to air rage.
Firstly the air pressure differential after take off means that air pockets of intestinal gas will be higher pressure and more likely to force themselves out of your chocolate barking spider.
Secondly, consider the smell of every other traveller that has sat in the same seat, warming the same cushion with the same intestinal gases and sweat, and dealing with the everpresent background noise and stress of air travel, while a crappy movie plays on a screen too small to see and which is blocked anyway by other passengers getting up, sitting down, or just hanging like douchebag fuckwits in the aisle talking to their colleagues because they think that air travel is FUN.
Meanwhile the stewardesses are busy standing in the rear gantry leaning against the snack boxes (which now cost $5 extra each just to buy) with their legs open and their panties around one ankle getting shagged from behind by the stewards, and the pilots are busy smoking weed as the airport handlers break the locks on your luggage down below to steal your souvenirs and computers, under broad security rights bestowed by the TSA federal agency while the lone fat greasy headed steward who can't get any female flight attendant to part her Pink Sea for him is taking out his frustrations by forcing people to move out of Economy-Plus seating (which costs you $75 more at the check-in counter than regular Economy for an extra 5 cm. of legroom) regardless of the fact that once the plane takes off the people will just fucking move back in because airport security can't board a moving plane, fuckwits.
This combination of low air pressure, substandard treatment, and superstandard psychological pressure results in larger than usual pockets of intestinal gas forcing themselves out of your anus and warming the fabric around your fundament.
This also means that ANY TIME A PASSENGER GETS OUT OF THEIR SEAT, their ass comes up to the same level as the seated passengers' faces. This is especially notable when the first over-caffeinated passenger jumps out of his seat at the end of a flight to grab his carry on luggage so he can be the first to wait in a completely stationary line to disembark, and you're still seated, and his ass wafts a foul stench your way that makes your eyes water.
Possibly a contributing factor to air rage.
16-B: What do you think of that chick in 14-D?
16-C: Hmm. Looks kinda tired.
16-B: She's got a sweet ass. And I think I saw her get into the toilets with a pink dildo. I think I'm gonna jerk off on her face.
16-C: Yeah, but she walked past me just now and I got a faceful of grade-A fetid rancid eyewatering airplane ass.
16-B: Eurgh. Okay. Never mind. (goes back to doing crossword puzzle)
16-C: Hmm. Looks kinda tired.
16-B: She's got a sweet ass. And I think I saw her get into the toilets with a pink dildo. I think I'm gonna jerk off on her face.
16-C: Yeah, but she walked past me just now and I got a faceful of grade-A fetid rancid eyewatering airplane ass.
16-B: Eurgh. Okay. Never mind. (goes back to doing crossword puzzle)
by HMB January 13, 2007
Get the airplane ass mug.