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The Geo Archon, broke but extremely skilled, aka "Daddy"

People often wonder how could a Geo character apply the "wet" status, especially to people in real life.

A Poem and Chant written to summon Zhongli:
Oh twink lord barbatos please make Zhongli come home to me
May the winds of the anemo archon guide him home
Oh shiny tartaglia make zhongli come home to me
May your waves guide him along the wind
Oh beautiful keqing make zhongli come home to me
May your storm lead the way
Oh queen ningguang make zhongli come home to me
May your rocks build the path
Oh zhongli please come home
May the geo archon finally come back
All Mighty Adepti of Cloud, Moon, and Mountains, steady our hearts to prepare

The Geo Archon's Arrival

Amen
Arianna: Dude, Zhongli's so hot!
Noelle: I know! I swear I'm gonna get him.
A man claiming to be the funeral consultant of the wangsheng funeral parlor, but is actually a delicious dragon god with the fattest ass in gaming history. His magical schlong, when summoned, is able to kill enemies, giving him the nickname of big dong zhong or schlongli.

Most times he defeats gods just by standing there ,watching his enemies nut to death because he’s so sexy. His sex appeal will have you on your KNEES and vomiting your entire life savings. Your life now REVOLVES around him. He is your god now.

It doesn’t matter that he’s a senior citizen on life support who commits embezzlement, you have peepaw issues and gilfs are hot.
Metaslave: “Bro Zhongli sucks, he barely does damage.”
Enlightened Zhongli simp: “Bitch have you seen that big dick and fat ass? He’s getting more pussy than anyone in the game. So, Mihoyo nerfed him to balance it out.”
Metaslave: “Oh shit yeah...now I kinda wanna suck him off ngl.”
Zhongli by Zhongslilcumrag January 16, 2021
the sexiest man alive who is lacking mora in his pockets
oh i love zhongli
Zhongli by zhonglishehe October 25, 2020

Zhonglism 

Religion of the horny Genshin players who simp for Zhongli. Their god is obviously known as Zhongli. Worshipping Zhongli's ass and enjoying Zhongli's pillar memes 24/7. Those who didn't get Zhongli in the game and fall into this category/religion are probably depressed.
We love Zhongli's ass and our religion is called Zhonglism
Zhonglism by Zhonglisdong August 24, 2021
My dad and also Rex lapis
"Zhongli?? y mean rex lapis??"
Zhongli by XiaoGenshin February 9, 2021
a sexy geo god who has the power to take anyones man or girl at any time, no matter how good you think you look it’s always zhongli > everyone
some guy: my girl just broke up with me
other guy: is it because of big ball geo daddy zhongli?
some guy: yeah
zhongli by bigballjohn April 16, 2021
More from Urban Dictionary
Ulzzang true definition is "best & "face" = best face in korean. They are basically people with above average looks, sometimes with the use of photoshop and haduri who post their pics online, some becoming internet celebrities.
"Hey, see that chick over there? She's pretty enough to be an ulzzang. :D"
ulzzang by `r i k kit t y February 26, 2008
Word of the Day on November 7, 2026
EBK stands for "Elite Ball Knowledge." 1 In internet slang, "ball knowledge" originally referred to a deep understanding of football/soccer or basketball, but it has evolved into a broader term for having a highly sophisticated, deep, or niche understanding of any specific topic (such as music, movies, or subcultures).
Person A: "That scene was a direct homage to an unreleased 1982 Japanese indie film."
Person B: "Wow, EBK."
EBK by silwhett November 5, 2026
Word of the Day on November 6, 2026
A seemingly endless debate with a idiot
I don't know man im not ready for yap trap stupidity today which always tries to suck you into it
Yap Trap by WolfieSnack November 4, 2026
Word of the Day on November 5, 2026
Texas is categorized as a swing state in presidential elections, but has voted for Republicans more times than for Democrats in recent history. As such, as demographics change political alignments, some Democrats believe that Texas will vote blue, or Democratic, due to their Hispanic and African American voters, who often align themselves with the Democratic Party's liberal wing.

Blexas has been cited as possible in the upcoming decades, but only if Democrats continue to win the Hispanic vote in bigger margins.
Democrat 1: What is your prediction for the 2024 presidential election?
Democrat 2: Well uh, Blexas!
Democrat 1: You've been saying that since 2008 though.
Blexas by Tritonist June 14, 2021
Word of the Day on November 4, 2026

briefcake 

"Did you check out the briefcake in courtroom C?"
briefcake by Ben Frey April 6, 2006
Word of the Day on November 3, 2026
Brought to public attention by Bob Woodward and Carl Bernstein in the book on the fall of Richard Nixon, All The President’s Men, ratfucker was Nixon’s term for a political operative who sows chaos among opponents; an agent provocateur. It is thought to have originated among campus political rivalries at USC, and seems to have some usage in the US military.
Along with Nixon’s other ratfuckers, Roger Stone caused fights at otherwise peaceful Democratic Party protests to generate a false narrative that the Democrats were violent and dangerous.
Ratfucker by Ricky Ramjet November 2, 2017
Word of the Day on November 2, 2026
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