urinal chess 

When you strategically select a urinal with the intention that the next bathroom goer will either have to go right next to you or will take the walk of shame into the stall.

Walk of shame = check mate, gain a point

If the second person selects a urinal next to the original urinal man but cannot phase the original guy, then he doesn’t gain a point (assuming he creates a stream). If the second guy is phased and cannot manage a stream, he loses a point.

If you need to do the walk of shame, you lose a point.

“Urinall In” - In the event that there are more than 5 urinals and there’s is a one urinal gap between two guys, one can earn two points for bridging the buffer zone successfully. If you can’t manage a stream, you lose two points.

If you’re on the offensive, you have 7 seconds to create a stream or it’s considered a “failure to manage”, resulting a loss of a point.

“The Matthew Wilder” - If somehow when on the offensive the 2nd player successfully intimidates the first goer enough to break their stream mid-stream. The offensive player is awarded 5 points. The person whose stream breaks loses 5.

Rick: Yo man I totally just had the most bodacious check mate on this kid in a game of urinal chess.

Ralph: shit man, how many points you at now?

Rick: I’m at 11 on the week. I’m kind of a pro.

urinal chess by KingOfTheUrinal May 3, 2018