The moist feeling from a butthole after a good poop. No matter how many showers you take, it's still wet, like a soccer-mom watching Magic Mike for the first time. Soccer-mom hole may or may not sting/burn.
"Bro, I took the biggest poop yesterday. It's been 16 hours and I still got the soccer-mom hole."
Fogey/fogy /fougi/ sl. (early 18C+, orig. Scot) old-fashioned, stuck-in-the mud.
Person with old fashioned ideas which he is unwilling to change: Come to the disco and stop being such an old fogey!
You think me an old fogeyand an old tory, his thoughtful voice said. I saw three generations since O’Connel’s time. I remember the famine. Do you know that the orange lodges agitated for repeal of the union twenty years before O’Connel did or before the prelates of your communion denounced him as a demagogue? You fenians forget some things. (James Joyce, Ulysses. Penguin Books,1992. p. 38)