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That dude's a sadlad.
sadlad by Umboiifyoudont March 25, 2019
Words you can keep
A food item that provides nutrients and invokes sadness.
"I'd love to go to Taco Bell for lunch, but unfortunately, I brought a sadlad today."
sadlad by liiindaaaaa November 26, 2017

THE SALAD GLOVE® 

(noun) a glove, developed by the band Andrew Jackson Jihad, that is used to eat salad whilst avoiding dangerous forks and messy cleanups
(noun) a useful eating utensil that is latex-free and one-size-fits-all
(noun) an easy and clean tool that enables you to FIST FUCK YOUR HUNGER™
(noun) that shit you can buy that, along with your iPod, you can sell to Bookmans when your wife dies and you lose your job (from the song People II: Still Peoplin' by Andrew Jackson Jihad)
**Tuesday 1:30pm - Two young men are sitting in a corner booth at Denny's - Max is frustrated with his Caesar salad**

Max: I know I'm being a bitch, but don't you think eating croutons with a fork is next to impossible and fucking annoying?
Tim: Dude, you need THE SALAD GLOVE®.
THE SALAD GLOVE® by Maxwell Dope November 14, 2013

salad shootin' 

When you've eaten too much salad, or other fiber source, and the second your butt hits the toilet seat feces shoots out at high velocity.
Neil: Hey man, you coming, we're gonna be late for that statistical overview meeting!

Bob: Naw, dude, I'm gonna be salad shootin' for a few more hours. NEVER eat Mexican yogurt!!!
salad shootin' by BADxKARMA April 4, 2013

right in front of my salad 

a meme from a gay porn scene where two guys are fucking in front of a woman who is enjoying her salad. she responds with "are you serious? right in front of my salad?" it is used to express annoyance when someone is doing something totally inappropriate in front of your eyes.
"Are you seriously being transphobic? Right in front of my salad?"

The Perfect Salad 

Tyler Christian Kendall"Dang Daniel, that salad last night was THE perfect salad"
The Perfect Salad by Megalog December 10, 2016

salad choice 

A slang term for a job or the method someone makes their money.
Right now I got the green, and it's not just 'cause my salad choice.
salad choice by The Great Dark February 8, 2015
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He is high school liquid, he ate lunch with the nerds and hung out with the jocks after school.
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