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lasterbating 

Masterbating so much that your dick falls off and that is your last time masterbating because your dick fell off
Jim: hey what were you doing last night?
Me: I was lasterbating.
Jim: Dude, your dick fell off?
Me: Yep.
lasterbating by Vagina McNuggets September 23, 2012

Plubsterbating

The act of shitting in ones hand, and then using said shit as lubrication for the act of masturbating.
"Oh shit I ran out of lube, what should I do?"
"Just practice the art of plubsterbating!"

plastergating 

Masturbating and/or ejaculation where the semen sticks and plasters itself to the walls, carpets, drapes, etc.
"Eesh, your plastergating got on the walls and ruined my Turkish drapes!"
plastergating by Slanginfoguy June 15, 2021

pasturbating 

Masturbating to something good that has happened to you or a friend in the past.
1. "Dude, do you remember that one time I got laid?" "Yeah, I'm pasturbating right now!"
2. "Pasturbation really is the best, especially if it happened to you!"
pasturbating by Xaneth April 4, 2014

plansturbating 

To over-complicate a situation through excessive or unnecessary planning, to the point that progress or enjoyment is hindered
1. We would already be halfway through with this project if the business would stop plansturbating and just let us work.
2. Family vacations are more work than fun because of all of Mom's plansturbating.

Pastorbating 

Accusing the media of unfairly and self indulgently going after Obama for his ties to racist, homophoe and afro-centrist hatemonger Jeremiah Wright.
Commonly used in the nutroots such as Democratic Underground,
usually by the far left black nationalists such as Frenchiecat and her alter ego Catherina.
The media is all in a self inflicted frenzy again. They are pastorbating.