Skip to main content

Crotch Theory Optimal 

"Crotch Theory Optimal" or "CTO" represents a modification of the poker term "Game Theory Optimal". It is a phrase that was first coined in the aftermath of the Stones Casino Cheating Scandal. When the scandal went viral in early October of 2019, hundreds of hours of poker cash game footage came under scrutiny by many amateur and professional poker sleuths. As a whole, the community came to the conclusion that Mike Postle, with the help of Justin Kuraitis and possibly others, was cheating while playing on the Stones Live Poker Stream. One of the alleged methods of cheating involved Mike Postle placing his phone between his legs, and viewing information about his opponents' hands real time. There is much video footage which shows him looking down at his crotch while playing poker hands. Once he had information about his opponents' hands, he then often made many non-standard, and highly profitable plays. Mike Postle demonstrated that all you have to do to play optimal poker is look down at your crotch. Thus the term was born: "Crotch Theory Optimal" Joe Ingram is generally credited for first using the term on one of his YouTube Videos.
I tried to bluff the river with 8 high but my opponent made a sick bluff check-raise with 9 high. That's when I had to dig deep, look down at the phone which was hidden snugly between my legs, and bust out a vicious Crotch Theory Optimal response.... Reraise allin.

Poker is so easy when you can play CTO.

Optimalternative 

When you see somebody doing something or acting some way and you want to do/be just the opposite.
Sunny was so sweet deciding that she would be optimalternative in her behavior as a reverse inspiration caused by the shenanigans she witnessed.

Optimal Drunkenness 

The point during the night when the alcohol level in the bloodstream provides the most buzz with the least chance of discomfort later.

In economic terms: the point at which the marginal product of drinking meets the marginal cost of drinking.
After 7 beers and 3 shots of vodka, I reached optimal drunkeness and partied all night.
Optimal Drunkenness by Chris Cole December 5, 2004

O.D.A. (Optimal distance of attraction) 

The distance at which a person is most attractive. Beer goggles decrease the ODA between persons.
"That chick has a long O.D.A. (optimal distance of attraction). I thought she was fine from a distance, but once I got up close, I realized she had a face like a horse."
Used when to describe something you are referring to without actually letting the adjective you want to use be known. Means simply, a good thing or a bad thing. Used in many ways. It takes skill.
"Dude, did you see that chicks hair? NOT OPTIMAL." or
"OMG, did you see that hot guy just walk by? OPTIMAL."

1) someone just stepped in dog shit. NOT OPTIMAL
2) i just found the perfect dress. OPTIMAL
optimal by nadaaaaa January 16, 2008

Blind Optism 

When you hope in vain and you know it and thats the worst part. You know that what you are hoping for won't happen and yet you keep at it. It's like Cuddy waiting for Dr.House to change but deep inside she knows he won't.
Cuddy: House, I am scared that I'll die, everyone is telling me that you won't visit me but I know you will, I have faith in you.
*House doesn't visit Cuddy at the hospital*
People: Told you so
Cuddy: No, you're wrong, he'll come around someday
*House doesn't visit Cuddy at hospital yet she keeps on waiting*
People: I admire your optimism Cuddy, but you know its blind optism, don't you?
Blind Optism by Amandinha Bynes August 22, 2011
More from Urban Dictionary

piddlefart

verb. To waste time doing nothing.
Instead of doing my homework, I decided to piddlefart around for two hours.
piddlefart by Rene April 25, 2005
Word of the Day on October 9, 2026
anyone who succeeds in disgracing/over indulging themselves in the throws of clubland
28 hours and 4 clubs later, gurning for england but still refusing to go home - a total wrongun!!
wrongun by bevvers March 21, 2007
Word of the Day on October 8, 2026

square grouper

Nickname given to bales of marijuana thrown overboard or out of airplanes. Origin is reportedly from members of the US Coast Guard in the area of Southern Florida.
"Base we've got some square groupers floating outside of Miami harbor."
square grouper by slipsheet November 6, 2004
Word of the Day on October 7, 2026
A girl who does ballet and only talks about ballet. Her schedule is filled with dance classes which does not allow her to do any other activity.
"Hey, do you know that girl Sally?"

"Yeah, she's kind of annoying. All she ever talks about it ballet."

"Wow, what a Bunhead."

"Hey Sally, you want to hang out this weekend?"
"I can't, I have dance."
"You're such a Bunhead."

"Yeah... I know."
Bunhead by Jen00 October 24, 2014
Word of the Day on October 6, 2026

trucker's tan 

A sunburn or suntan focused on the left arm. It is caused by the left side of the body being the only half that gets exposed to sunlight while driving. Presumably, it would be located on the right side of the body in countries where they drive on the left side of the road.
I had a trucker's tan after driving for 10 straight hours on a sunny day.
Word of the Day on October 5, 2026
The phenomenon where adults salivate at children's toys
Every time I walk into the toy aisle, I catch myself kidulting over the latest action figures and LEGO sets!
kidulting by Emotional Cruiser October 12, 2025
Word of the Day on October 4, 2026
Load more