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New Paltz

Located in the Hudson Valley of New York. Colorful, mountainous utopia of hippies, D1 ruggers, and an exceptionally good-looking university soccer team. The town that inspired Bob Dylan to pen "All Along the Watchtower" and Paul Simon's " Killer goes to College". People play bongos at 4 am and the geese have phallus-shaped heads. There are an array of quaint boutiques and ethnic eateries in the downtown area.
by carly2 October 16, 2005
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new paltz

a town full of deemster heads with dried up pinneal glands.
kids from new paltz do deemster handstands with umbrellas, "oh that kid's from new paltz... he probably puffs mad deemz" "new paltz is not the dunzo"
by mulberrysdream December 16, 2008
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New Paltz

A town in the Mid-Hudson Valley of New York full of old Grateful Dead loving burn-outs. Homeless people sit on the stairs in front of the stores and play bongos and talk to the drunk college kids who walk by. Strangely full of gay people and lesbians with hairy armpits. Marijuana is in large abundence. Theres about 500 pizza places on Main Street. The mountains are pretty too.
New Paltz is the wanna-be Woodstock.
by S Dawg April 15, 2006
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New Paltz

A small community of burn-outs, Woodstock left-overs, NYC minority imports, wannabe artists, and openly flaming gays that if you were raised here and did not leave after high school graduation you're a complete loser.
You dropped out of UCCC, got into drugs, work at a deli, date other losers who couldn't seem to get out of town, and live with your parents still? Ohhhhh you must have been raised in New Paltz!
by karaNY April 9, 2006
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New Paltz Hot

A term that I have used in abundance during my days at New Paltz. The "New Paltz Hot" phenomenon is when an attractive woman will lower her dating standards to accommodate to the male selection at New Paltz. It epitomizes the Darwinian struggle. New Paltz statistics are against you from the beginning. With a school that's 70% women and 30% men, you're bound to run into some problems. While a 7:3 ratio may seem appealing at first, let's dig a little deeper into the real percentages. Looks can be deceiving in more ways than one. Of those 30% men, half of them are either gay, bi, or confused. You're left with a cumulative 15%. You soon begin to question whether guys you would never have found attractive prior to the New Paltz experience are actually attractive. This disillusionment will continue to grow with each progressive year you attend school. Soon, you find yourself dating a burnout, wanna-be rapper with no sense of direction. A true catch. The "New Paltz Hot" cannot be evaded. Your only defense is to go back home, or to other colleges, as often as possible.

May the odds be ever in your favor.

Synonyms may include but are not limited to: Real-world ugly, New Paltz handicap, "okay-looking," the "I-don't-know-what-I-was-thinking" summer break realization, etc.
Sam: "I've questioned as to whether or not I should turn lesbian just to better my chances. Still single as fuck. "
Amanda: "New Paltz problems."

Stefanie: "Why can't I find a boyfriend?"
Lisa: "It's not you, it's New Paltz."

Jennifer: "I need your opinion, is this guy "real-world" hot or just New Paltz hot?"
Katie: "I don't know... I can't tell the difference anymore."
by NewPaltzProblems October 19, 2012
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New Paltz Hot

A term used to describe females lowering their standards when it comes to choosing men, while attending SUNY New Paltz due to the fact that attractive men are very scarce. This drastic decline in taste effects these young women for the rest of their lives; they will continue to believe that unattractive men are indeed attractive.
Nikki- Hey, did you see that dirty guy on that stoop next to Fat Bob's? He's kinda hot.
Valerie- Yeah, but only "New Paltz Hot".
by zzz123 May 9, 2009
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New Paltz middle School

A school in the a small town with a bunch of pot smoking hobos with there very own gay pride club. Kids in the school can change there names to things like Kit Jesse and other things. The school is a prison and the bathrooms are a juul hangout spot
by Griffin savage November 5, 2019
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