Skip to main content

Monkey Wank

Pleasuring oneself with the feet, whilst swinging in a tyre.
I'm off home for a banana, a few nuts and a monkey wank.
by Borthers February 21, 2007
mugGet the Monkey Wank mug.

monkey wank

eg i got bored last night so i climbed a tree and had a monkey wank
by lokimike October 26, 2008
mugGet the monkey wank mug.

Monkey Wank

The act of masturbating whilst making loud monkey noises, such as 'ooooh eeeh ah ah ah oooh ahh ahhh!'
''Christy was screaming last night in his room. I think he was having a monkey wank!''
by PdizDog November 27, 2011
mugGet the Monkey Wank mug.

monkey wank

1. A situation note entirely going the desired way.

2. Of something which is totally useless.
As the chief engineer watched the new bridge come crashing down on its first opening plunging 100 cars and occupents into the river below, he was heard to comment "This is turning into a pile of stale monkey wank"
by Norbert Colon October 15, 2004
mugGet the monkey wank mug.

Wank monkey

A person that is socially inept and yet full of themselves.

Someone whose only source of conversation is themselves and the things they get up to.

The word derives from the common word for masturbation and monkey, the animal that uses aggressive displays to prove their social status.
It occurred to me as I heard about Nikki's time as a stripper that she was a huge wank monkey.
by Alan-O September 26, 2007
mugGet the Wank monkey mug.
Some neurosurgeon posted a definition for masturbate with a bunch of synonyms and decided it would be a good idea to make them all one big link, which is how you got here to this page. Here's to that genius.
I hope that person catches AIDS from masturbating.



SYNONYMS: chokin' the chicken, spanking the monkey, flogging the dolphin, beating off, jackin' off, buffing the banana, wanking off, playing with yourself, tootin' your horn, fighting the purple helmet warrior, rubbing the one-eyed snake, commiting spermicide, taking your turn at the self-serve station, fishing with your zipper trout, beating the shit out of your midget friend, makin' mayo, polishing the family jewels, test-firing the old meat missle, wrapping the hand around the penis and moving it in a thrusting movement.
by Catamount June 21, 2008
mugGet the SYNONYMS: chokin' the chicken, spanking the monkey, flogging the dolphin, beating off, jackin' off, buffing the banana, wanking off, playing with yourself, tootin' your horn, fighting the purple helmet warrior, rubbing the one-eyed snake, commiting spermi mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email