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Kerns

A term used to describe a guy who wants to be cool but just ends up being more annoying than an 8 year old with ADHD who just drank 5 gallons of sugar-laden Kool-Aid.

(Note: Referred to as a "guy", although technically not a male - a large, untrimmed vag with pubic lice can be seen where the penis is usually found on a man.)
Girl: Do you hear that irritating motherfucker? Why is he fully grown, but still acts like my little sister in elementary school??

Guy: Yeah, he's a total Kerns. People always want to bitchslap the shit out of him, but it would feel too much like child abuse.
by tvrepairman October 23, 2010
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Kerns

To sleep with your mom, except not as a 4-year-old who's scared of the dark, but after you're well into adulthood.
Kerns: So mom, same place same time tonight? ;) (*cough* my room, midnight *cough*)

Guy nearby: Holy shit. Talk about the creepiest family of losers around.
by rodentcontrol October 30, 2011
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what a kerns

an insult used to describe something outrageous
"what a kerns move"
"omg what a kerns"
by ricky gg October 26, 2007
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Todd Dammit Kerns

Bassist for Slash and the Conspirators. Guitarist for Sin City Sinners. His name is Todd Dammit because it rhymes with God Dammit. Todd is awesome.
Dude, who is that guy with Slash?

Oh, that's Todd Dammit Kerns!
by Mr Mojo fuckin Risin August 15, 2012
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Emily Kerns

Emily is shy at first but after getting to know she’s very caring, funny, and an amazing friend. She is very beautiful and smart. Can be very crazy at times but that’s what makes her fun. Is very good at telling why mood people are in after a few minutes of bed ngnnear them. Trying to hide your emotions around her is a waste of time. She also hides her emotions not wanting to be hurt, or hurt others. Easily loved by many, though gets sad when she likes a guy and he doesn’t like her back. Often over looks potential relationships that are right in front of her. But no matter why she will be there for you, so don’t shut her out of your life.
by He’s kind December 4, 2018
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Thomas Kerns

a complete and total bad ass nothing can stop him ever and all those who try end in death...
Rambo, chuck norris, hell boy
holy crap chuck norris is a total Thomas Kerns
by Gangstar December 14, 2008
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Kolten Kerns

Biggest queer to ever touch the surface of this Earth. So gay the he has to frame being straight to his friends by dating a black woman. Says Olah every time he joins the discord in the gayest possible voice. Litterly everyone despises Kolten Kerns.
yo, you see Kolten Kerns over there? RUN HES A QUEER!!!!!
by koltenkernsisfuckinggay November 4, 2019
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