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jesus fucks

"Already being late for work this morning, I encountered one of those jesus fucks and it stalled me an additional 5 minutes!"
jesus fucks by 8088Y80M8 January 1, 2012
Words you can keep

Jesus fuck 

When something scares you so bad you can’t just say fuck
*jon jumps out from behind a car*

Lizzie:Jesus fuck!
Jesus fuck by Destiny🥵 February 21, 2020

jesus fuck 

A combination of two of the most offensive swear words of our day, "Jesus fuck" is unique in its ability to offend damn near anyone.

Notable for its use in the beginning of the Leftover Crack/Citizen Fish split CD Deadline.
STZA: Well Dave, according to my most recent calculations
and factoring in all the ignorant sycophant cop-callers,
there are in excess of a billion police in this world.

DICTOR: Jesus fuck! That's a lot of pigs.
jesus fuck by Fatlard Lars January 6, 2008

jesus fuck 

a word that is the ultimate offensive word and example of frustration, by combining "jesus" & "fuck" you can pretty much piss of anyone
"aww jesus fuck, i dropped my gogirt."

"let me get this straight, she likes tacos and sex, jesus fuck shes cool."

"you punched out a pterodactyl, jesus fuck thats badass"

"jesus fuck i lost mcGee"
jesus fuck by zack love April 9, 2008

Jesus Fuck 

-noun
1. An ecstasy-inducing religious experience.

2. A conversation between dating individuals who refuse to have sex, and so choose, instead, to talk about their love for their Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

-interjection
1. An exclamation that is markedly more serious than the traditional words "fuck" or "Jesus." It is pronounced as if there is a comma between the two words: "Jesus, FUCK"
Person 1: What did you and that guy do last night? Did you hook up?

Person 2: You know, he is really religious and stuff. That got in the way, so we decided to Jesus Fuck instead.
Jesus Fuck by BetaBlocker July 8, 2010

Jesus Fuck 

When you lay her down on a crucifix, and nail her three times. On the third day, you'll be able to get a rise again.
Bob: "I heard Sara got Jesus Fucked last summer".

Tony: "Is that where you put her on a crucifix and nail her three times?"

Bob: "Yeah dude."

Tony: "Holy, holy, holy lord. God of power and might."

Jesus-fuck 

The prime expletive, to be used only by asskickers or in dire situations.
Jeff did my mom? JESUS-FUCK!!
Jesus-fuck by Philbert_McGee June 12, 2018
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